How can I get my mind off my ex?

my girlfriend of almost 3 years just broke up with me 3 weeks ago because she said that she wasn't feeling it anymore and thought that it was best if we broke up. its been three weeks since we broke up, I haven't contacted her in any way but I can't get the thought of her off my mind, no matter what I do a small part of me is thinking about her. She basically told me that she just wanted to be single and have fun, which really hurt. all of my good friends go to different colleges than me and I normally would have her to talk to but now I don't and I just feel so alone. I know that I deserve better and need to move on and find someone who actually appreciates and wants me, and that unless she changes it can't work between us, but its still so hard to forget about her. any advice on what I could to do help me feel better?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • at least she was honest and didn't date anyone behind your back I guess.

    try to focus on the positives, sorry for your loss. Some days I feel alone as well but I broke it off with my guy-due to harrassment.

    obviously it's good to go out there, make some new friends, keep your mind busy.

    I'm keeping myself busy, school, work, volunteering, talking to other guys, but I haven't dated. I'm not ready yet.

    so my advice is go at your own pace, keep a journal, get an emotional outlet going, do counselling if it helps, hit the gym. try to keep everything positive and I'm sure you won't be sad for much longer. best of luck.

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 4

  • First things first, remember that calling or contacting her in anyway is going to do nothing other than hurt you more. It is very good that you haven't do it until now and I know you have no intention of doing so, but I believe this to be important enough to tell you it anyway.

    It doesn't help that your friends went to other colleges. Do you have any friends at your current college? You could spend more time with them of you feel like it.

    If all else fails, you will have to find a way to be by yourself but still have fun/relax. You have to distract yourself from the break up and her. I would do this by playing a game, watching one of my favorite shows or just surfing about the internet. It depends on what you enjoy doing. If you play sports, make music or have any other hobby, put more time into them! Do things you enjoy doing, it will make you feel better.

    There is one thing I have to tell you though, and it sucks. You cannot expect yourself to just forget about her and move on all of a sudden. While these things will help, they won't take it away. Whenever you think about her, first think of something good and happy from the relationship, but then after a few seconds, remind yourself why it is a good thing she broke up with you. You should not lie to yourself that the entire relationship was bad, because it wasn't. Yet, it was simply not going to work in the long run, but nevertheless, it was time well spend. Take comfort in the fact that you had a good time, but it simply ran its course, which isn't a bad thing. Trying to keep it alive would be a bad thing, because it would only make the break up messier in the end.

    I hope this helped. Feel free to ask any question you have.

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  • I'm not going to lie and tell you it'll get better. I'm in your shoes right now and its been almost a month. I deleted everything I had of her and just never thought about her. I had to change my proprieties and no this won't get your mind totally off her but enough to lessen the pain. Stay strong I'm sure in time you'll heal...but you'll never forget. I just think that's just life and you have to own it.

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  • First of all, don't fall in to temptation and contact her. If you want to get over her your only chance is to sever the ties. Second, it will take time. You best just pucker up cause the next couple of months will be an emotional roller coaster if you're anything like me.

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  • Just be patient. It will get better after some more weeks. Try to keep yourself busy with other stuff meanwhile.

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