How do you get over a girl you love?

I met this girl a long time ago. She was dating my friend, and at the time I thought she was the prettiest girl I had ever seen. Honestly, I was jealous of my friend. He had scored this girl who had a golden personality. Not only that, but the way her and I got along was not something that happened between most girls and I. She was playful and cute, and whenever she came around I found myself daydreaming about kissing her, holding hands and stealing her from my friend; however, I felt like a jerk for wanting to break them apart. He brought her around to parties we all attended, and mostly I found myself spending time with her. We made excellent partners in drinking games, and like I said she was so playful I could flirt with her the whole time. Her and my friend break up all the time, but always end up together like magnets. They must have something special. I just can't help to feel like her and I could be perfect together. He is very jealous of her and I, so we never see each other anymore. Whenever I do talk to her I'm reminded of all the good times we shared, and I just wish her and my friend would have never met in a way. Instead her and I meet, and we ride out to the sunset together. I realize these feelings are pointless. I try not to think about it, but I wish I could tell her without it messing anything up. I don't want them to break up, and I know he makes her happy. Not to mention the dude and I are pretty good friends on some level. I guess I just wanted to rant about it, because it's hard falling for someone you know you can't have. Especially when you meet perfectly good single girls who you can't seem to find interesting.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hard situation. You say she has a golden personality, but form experience unless you live with her on a day to day basis you will never really know her true personality, only the good side of her.

    If your friend is treating her with respect and honesty etc and they seem good together I would leave it alone. If he's a good friend you need to let go of her and move on. Maybe stop hanging out with her at parties so much and concentrate on other people there. You can never really move on until you can forget about her. When you meet other potential partners, you will never meet anyone good if you keep comparing this girl with them.

    Remember they keep breaking up and getting back together, she can't be that perfect personality wise if there always doing this. You also said she flirts with you. She may seem amazing but any girl that flirts with her boyfriends friends has issues , trust me on this. No girl who loved there boyfriend or treated him with respect would do this.

    I think your more obsessed with the idea of her then her and her being beautiful tends to amplify the situation. This happens a lot by the way, people love the idea of the person but then they get them and the idea isn't as great as the person in the end.

    I know it's a hard situation but If you are honestly meant to be with each other, it will happen. But don't betray your good friends for it. You could always travel and have no contact for a few months, this might help.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Theres is no pill,or recovering word that helps you get over someone,it takes time. It won't be now but soon or later. Forcing yourself to get over someone and the half of you wants them back, and knowing nobody compares makes you want them more,just one step at a time.


What Guys Said 1

  • I've been right there and it sucks so bad. I had a great friend that I met in high school and into college and he got a girlfriend in college that was so beautiful and playful, sweet and caring that I could be myself around her and she just loved it. But, like you, I cherished my friendship with my buddy and didn't want to ruin it so I never did anything about this girl. Now he was a good person, but for whatever reason he didn't treat women right. It weren't like he hit or beat them, he just acted like it was something he had to do. I heard they split up and now they both have moved on, but I can't help asking "what if?". I will always ask that to myself.

    So, kudos for putting your friendship before your feelings, but the break up game sounds like this is one of those through college or whatever relationships. Ask yourself if you would rather ask and know and risk loosing your friend, but possibly finding your soul mate, or if you would rather not ask, not know, and keep your friend and risk seeing the girl you love fade from your life. Hard choices man, but I don't know if you ever get over it 100%

    Master of long posts nobody reads because they're so long,