Is it wrong to breakup with someone who isn't helping theirself out?

i let this girl live with me a for a year and a half but we been dating for a year in a half. I'm basically tired of repeating myself. she stays around me every single waking moment so therefore I can't accuse her of anything. she has a job but have to work the same shifts I do because I have to go pick her up. all she do is stay on my passenger side. I have to take her here I have to take her there I have to pick her up from here and there..she never drives it always be me driving her around. whatever I does, she does. its snowing here where I'm located and she's acting like she the one who is driving. I made a video telling people about the roads, she's on the passenger sides taking pictures acting like she the one that has to be out here on this ice. she has over 300 photos of me doing almost everything. don't get me wrong she help pay my bills and give me money and buy me things but it don't benefit me when you're not even helping yourself out. I haven't brought it to her attention yet about the breakup until after my birthday because I'm scared she's gonna have a mental meltdown again. she deploy in may but that's not good enough. you can't forget about yourself when you stay with a guy. she chose me over college opportunities. I'm working 2 jobs while she work one job which is a morning shift and I have to chauffeur there to. I'm about to be 23 years old and I don't want to be dealing with this kind of situation. I don't count the army as her second job because weekend drill out of a month isn't nothing if you not helping yourself out. she has all her friends stalking on me in the internet and I'm not even following them back and still somehow they see my photos still. the only thing she's offering is money sex and drama. I tried to give her a boost. throughout this whole entire relationship, I been driving. I even had to tell her to quit taking so many photos of me. now she's became obsessed over me. she go everywhere with me and I'm tired of looking at her. I can't accuse her of cheating because she be around me that much.


Most Helpful Girl

  • She stays around me every waking moment so therefore I can't accuse her of anything... Wha?

    Why would you need to accuse her of cheating LOL

    Just break up with her. For god's sake WTF


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What Girls Said 2

  • One. This was very hard to read, work on your English, maybe you should take the college classes she refused. I had to play scrabble to understand this. Two, you sound very rude. Of course it's mean, but it's in her best interest. If you don't care about her, staying with her is not only cruel, but unfair. Leave her as soon as possible so she can find someone else who can appreciate her affectionate nature. Everyone loves at different levels, just because you don't like how much time she wants to spend with you, doesn't make her a stalker. Also, having the same shift saves GAS which is an important step in a budge for a YOUNG couple. We're about the same age, so I understand her reasoning there. Also, some people are bad drivers, if they choose not to drive, why nag? It could save a life keeping someone who doesn't trust their driving OFF the steering wheel. Sure she could be a bit of a stalker, but how can we tell with your broken English? I barely understood it.

    Three.. Girls want to be around their boyfriends. Typically boyfriends feel the same.

    FOUR Military IS a job. It's insulting to say it isn't. I'd love to see you say it isn't to a man serving their country. Just because she hasn't been deployed, she still is doing something for her country which is more than we can say for you. You're busy nagging about her and being under appreciative. If she has a job, she is bettering herself. She isn't a whiny, useless, gold digger begging for or stealing all of your money. Just break up with her because thinking this way about her is downright cruel. How can you really be mad at someone for loving you? Sheesh. At least she ISN'T cheating on you. Dump her. Go find some whore I promise she won't dote on you and give you presents. You'll love it. There aren't a lot of faithful people out there these days and this question makes me understand why more girls are having casual sex instead of relationships. She's taking pictures of you because she's proud of you, which sadly isn't a gesture returned to her. Honestly the best thing to do is breakup with her because you honestly don't know what you're talking about in this question.

    Helping yourself out is being financially stable, physically fit, she doesn't sound like she's horrible. If you have two jobs and she has one then I don't see how she is with you all the time.

    Lastly, In order to have FRIENDS it means she has to talk to them/spend time with them, therefore it seems you are overreacting. If you are unhappy, dump her. It doesn't matter what we think. You're shallow either way it goes.

    • Also, she'd be reading this if she was a stalker, just saying.

    • lmao I didn't even read this you could have kept this mess

    • i don't want a girl around me all 24 hours of the day and everywhere I go, they gotta be there. I don't want a girl who won't let me go anywhere alone. take your clingyness somewhere else

  • you shouldn't want to accuse her of cheating anyway, that's a cowardly way to break up because you know its not true even if she wasn't around you all the time.

    just tell her the truth, she's being too suffocating and you can't deal with someone in your presence 24/7 always taking pictures of you and obsessing over you and having her friends stalk you, also tell her she's being lazy working only a morning shift and giving up college for a guy she's only been with a year and a half. that's her future and she should care about it cause she will end up with nothing if her relationsips don't work out.

    i also think you're only keeping her till after your birthday because you want a gift from her because dumping her now or after will still hurt her exactly the same if you're worried about a meltdown, waiting till after your birthday isn't going to change anything.

    • Try rereading this. I said I can't accuse her of cheating or anything...meaning that she's stay around me a lot I can't accuse her of anything if I had to

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    • If she has a job and is getting deployed in may according to what he says...she isn't exactly lazy. She could be just spending her time with him as much as she can before she leaves. People die over there.. Also I think he wants the gift as well! She'll melt down MORE after giving the gift if anything. Also college is her choice, if she is in the military she's not exactly an unemployed bum. If she makes it a career she can still get retirement, so it's not a waste.

    • i don't think she's being lazy at all, I'm just telling him to tell her what he says about her. the part I personally think is wrong is that she's giving up college for a boyfriend who could dump her in the future

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