Why did he really stop dating me?

So, this guy I had liked for quite some time discovered through a mutual friend that I liked him. He was super excited that I thought he was cute and nervous to ask me out. He even went to all my friends to get advice on how to approach me. Long story short, we ended up dating for almost four weeks. He seemed to really like me because he kept my friend updated on how well our dates went and even told my friend that he thought he could see me as his girlfriend. He also sought any opportunity to take me out to eat or spend time together (in between classes and our schedules, etc.) He texted me every day and morning asking me how my day went and it felt like he was interested.

Until, that is, he suddenly stopped texting me. Days later out of the blue he asked how I was doing. He sent me a few texts after that telling me to have a good day, etc. But I knew something was up. Then one day early in the morning he sent me a lengthy text basically saying he was too busy with school and work and a possible second job. He said he didn't want to half-ass any sort of relationship. I told him I understood and wished him the best of luck but what I really wanted to ask him was, "What's the real reason?" I know there's probably a bigger explanation because the guy basically distanced himself from me for a few days by not contacting me. So, any thoughts on this?

I really need some sort of clarity and I don't know if I should ask him for it. We work for the same company and I don't want to make things more awkward for him but my mind keeps pacing over this!


Most Helpful Guy

  • My dear friend,guys are like that only. He may be really busy. But what will you do waiting for him to date you? If possible tell him what is in your mind and if necessary find out another guy who is free to date you.

    • You're exactly right! I don't want to wait for him and miss any chances or let him see me all down about it. I'll take your advice and confront him and move on. Thank you for the advice (:

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • No one can tell you this other than him. Perhaps he's telling the truth, or he realized he didn't like you enough or there's another reason. But the only way to know for sure is to ask him.

    • Thank you for your advice. You're right. But I wonder if I'll just be pestering him at this point. I'll have to figure out a way to casually approach him I guess.

    • I suppose, but if he doesn't want to be around you, the faster the better.

What Girls Said 2

  • Could be because he a.) lost interest b.) knew that he couldn't balance a relationship with his job c.) maybe after chit chatting with you a couple of times decided that he didn't want to pursue anything further than what you guys currently.

    I would not stress over it... There are other guys out here.

    • typo:: than what you guys currently have**

  • Im sort of confused why he would continue to text you especially asking you how your day was etc. My question to you is this- did you reply back to him when he out of the blue was texting you or did you leave him in the dust because you thought he wasn't interested?

    If your answer is you didn't respond back to him then maybe he thought you werent really interested in him?

    • I'm confused about that too lol! I think he was just being nice before he had to let me down. I responded back every time though. I didn't want to be clingy and decided not to text him first a couple times because I thought he needed some space but when we would hang out I definitely let him know I was interested in him. I thought the feeling was mutual but guess not.