My now ex boyfriend told me to go get raped and abused by my other ex?

Before I was in a relationship with this guy, I was in a very abusive relationship. I got out of it somehow and I ended up with this guy. We had a fight, broke up, and he told me I deserved to be abused and raped. People are trying to tell me to talk to him, and try to get him back. But is he really worth it for saying something so harsh?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I will give this jerk the benefit of the doubt, and say that it was said in the "heat of the moment"

    BUT! No he is not worth getting back. I can understand saying something out of anger, but this goes way over and above that.

    Anyone who would wish serious physical and mental harm against someone because that's what they "deserve." Has got a violent streak in them, that can come out when angered. In my mind he is unpredictable.

    Don't make excuses for him. He is the one who "deserves" what he gets. In other words he doesn't deserve YOU.

    Stay away from him.


    • no one should ever say anything like that "in the heat of the moment" that is inexcusable. a "you bitch" is something that is said in the heat of the moment. not "i hope you get raped and abused" that's despicable and he's clearly a callous person with the emotional maturity of an infant.

    • Show All
    • This is a good answer. I would wait and see if your new ex even apologizes before even thinking about reconciling, let alone getting back together with him. Somewhere down the line maybe the two of you can get good closure.

    • Exactly what Ironeddie said! wait for better and avoid!

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What Guys Said 2

  • My dear friend,guys hate rejection and so they go to any extent to harass their ex G/F. You have done a right thing to dump hi!

  • Breakups are messy and people might say hurtful things in the heat of the moment. If you can't overlook ONE verbal attack during a breakup fight, I don't think you're ready to have a relationship with anyone.

    • You're an asshole.

    • I'm being honest. When people get involved in romantic relationships, hurting each other is always on the table. If he's constantly hurting you that's a toxic relationship and you should run away, if you hurt him (by dumping him) and he hurt you back, although it's not very mature on his side, you should be ready. He made one hurtful comment and you are doubting your whole relationship... well, you're not ready for a relationship.

What Girls Said 2

  • Get him back? after he told you such an horrible thing?

  • No he's not worth doing ANYTHING for. I had the same thing happen. You think that you can tell someone that you're intimate with.. your past. But also remember! Us girls that have had the bad luck of being in abusive relationships, don't have the BEST choices of men. And whoever the scum was that threw it in your face, that ever could THINK you deserved it.. is emotionally abusive. For me, it was during a fight. And when he said that... I about dropped to the floor. (it was through the phone so I could have).. I was shocked. How could this "nice" boy do anything in line with that kind of thing.

    But there were red flags with him too, and he wasn't ACTUALLY all that nice. Just NICER than my abuser.

    Just like you were of "the worth" to DESERVE (not JUST BE but to DESERVE to be) abused.. he's WORTH the same thing he insinuated - and trust me - he meant, cause who in their right minds can come up with that. Only a person who is DEEPLY capable and UNBOTHERED by hurting someone - and someone who WANTS to hurt you.

    He stabbed you in the weakest part of your heart, and he meant to. He knew it. That's how abusive people are. They know exactly where they've broken you and... he's not worth it.

    There's a book that I love that I HOPE you read, you can download it for free if you're a first time member called : "Why Does He Do That" about abuse and it walks you through the makeup of this person and why it is NEVER by accident the things they do.

    You DIDN'T DESERVE IT! and karma will bite him so HARD (it may take time). But you know what's more important RIGHT NOW? .. is that you didn't deserve someone who could SAY/thing that either. Not at all.
    <3 (I know it's hard)


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