Do you have to take things extremely slow with shy guys?

Like, not pressure them into anything and start off by being friends and taking it extremely slow?

I'm a shy girl, and yeah that would seem kind of nice if someone did that for me as well, but I'm not sure if its the same with guys. I find it odd that someone thinks like me so I kind of want some insight on this.

I am starting to get feelings for this guy. I didn't immediately like him when I first met him and to be honest, I wanted to punch him in the stomach many times for various reasons, mainly because he would piss me off. He was rude to me and I was rude to him but I started to be nice, in order to keep the peace, and he is starting to be nicer. I have started to pay more attention to him and he isn't actually an asshole. Well, he kind of is. He's kind of quiet and awkward and a bit monotonous like sheldon cooper but not as bad, but he's actually a sweet guy, in his own way. Not a smiley guy, he blushes easily, he's quiet, but that man is adorable. It was a rocky beginning to how we met but now we kind of spend more time with eachother and I don't know about him, but I do enjoy being near him.

We work together so that's where we see eachother. I would always catch him looking at me alot. and I am barely starting to realize that he comes over to where I am alot. he used to pass by a lot but I never really gave it much thought. I thought he would pass by just to piss me off and ruin my day. But lately, he actually comes and lingers around where I am for a while. I thought they had assigned him to come over, but they didn't because they keep calling him back to our other department. (both of our departments are together.) Or if I'm on one aisle, he'll be on the other side doing something else. If I go over there, he'll explain what he's doing there, even though I never asked. I mean I'm fine with him hanging out. We both don't talk much, but it doesn't feel like we need to. It does get awkward sometimes, like when we are really close to eachother. None of us step away, and sometimes, he even steps closer to me.

It's just weird that he doesn't say much. I don't etiher. I'm not much of a talkative person. I don't think he is either.

So if I wanted to do something with this guy, do I have to talk to him more before I make a move? it seems like ever since I started being nicer and asking him for help, he has opened up a bit more. He tries to make conversation, but then when I say something he gets serious. he makes no sense, but this is progress. at least he tries to talk to me now so it seems to be getting better.

what do I do with this kind of guy? the socially awkward shy man?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well here you go from a shy guy..

    I would of love everything simple and plain no complications, show him you like him.. even if you might need to state it lol.. Because it would be a bit hard for us to do the move ourselves and yet we will be so frustrated to ask of this is true? this is happening? someone's liking me while being shy etc ?!

    Be nice to him, show him you like him.. be calm and don't be pushy. Like if you want to go out with him, get to him calmly open a subject and make sure he is paying attention like how much you like going to that restaurant or if you're interested into watching a certain movie and then go like..

    Lets say he's called John :P, "John, how about coming with me to that place/movie?" with a smile on your face. We love things simple, we have too much going into our brains already. Maybe this is the reason he was rude at start.. he was like, hey I'm lonely and I know I am, so I'm not in need of that one too disturbing my calm. :D

    Hope I've helped a bit, you do the move and be sure it's simple and plain.. no loud voice no giving orders no too much excitement look him in the eyes saying you like him, without actually saying the words he'll get it.

    • Thanks. This is actually really helpful. It's just what I was looking for. I really don't think its such a good idea to just go up to the guy and ask him because he's shy. I'm terribly shy too and I hate when people are too forward. I don't see how this would work, it would in fact push me away.

      But most like I'll have to make the move?

      Would I have to keep talking to him more before I do that? It seems like he's barely getting comfortable around me and I am too.

    • Show All
    • Sorry if this came late :S Too late actually.

      You should take things slowly, if he's all fine with you ask them to go with you somewhere that's not of a hassle and not distant of your workplace.. and doesn't take long time to get done with.

      If they seemed to like it, and you liked it then ask HEY why don't we repeat this later on?
      Try repeating the same thing again just to get him and yourself used of being out together and then take that on to another level of spending more time outside together ;).

    • Its fine. Actually, lots of things happened since i posted this. We got more comfortable with eachother in the next few months. We would play fight a lot but we would always stand up for eachother and he always did really nice things for me. We would even spend a lot of time together at work.

      It turns out he had a girlfriend. I feel so stupid. He also already changed jobs. I almost told him how i felt on his last day but i didnt. He comes to visit but i haven't been there when he does.

      So things didn't end too well, but not too bad either.

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