How do I get over a guy?

I met this guy at work (my supervisor) and at first I didn't pay much attention but after awhile he definitely caught my eye and I couldn't help it. Me and him are Very quiet and don't talk much. We are very similar and I think we would be good together. After talking and texting, I asked him out and he first said he had to help his family (which was true) then a couple weeks later I tried again and he said he didn't feel comfortable cause He my supervisor, but that we can still text and that was okay. That was about 3 months ago and I've been trying to get over him and I've done everything, but something is preventing me from moving on. We casually text a lot, and I still want to be friends at least. He is the only guy I have actually been able to physically visualize a future with (With previous guys I've been able to visualize my future or even wedding with).

I just don't know what to do next to move on. I was even tempted to switch jobs to figure out how it will end up.
On an additional note: I am nervous a lot of times because he's told me that he doesn't always get notified of my texts so I'm always nervous that I said something when he doesn't respond after a few messages...even though he's told me he doesn't get notified. I don't know how he would feel to me calling him or if it would be good.

I am 20 and he is 27, I don't care about the age but it is clear to me that he has other things to focus on that I don't have yet.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm sorry, but I don't see how this would have to be over just because he is your supervisor. But then again, what do I know. The thing holding you back is your chemistry with him. You got along great with someone after some time so it's hard just to turn away from it, but if he doesn't want it too, you have to leave it. The best way to get over someone is to keep telling yourself there are plenty more out there, but that alone is not enough. You have to believe that there is someone else and eventually find him. Go eat with friends or something and have a good to distract you from him.

    Hope I helped!


    • How can I tell what he wants without asking him? I would think that if he was okay with talking to me, he still wants to talk to me. (He told me that the reason is that something happened previously Where he was "Burned" for a similar reason; which makes him feel uncomfortable dating a coworker)

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • No... he doesn't have much of anything else to focus on. Sure he's older but we've all got shit to do, even younger people.

    Don't quit your job over that! Just get over it. Work on it and acknowledge that he won't take that risk and just be his friend. But I mean, if that's really how strongly you feel about it... don't forget that maybe he was just being nice and he just lost interest in you. So here you go, quit your job, then find out he still won't date you? That would suck big time.


What Girls Said 1

  • I think you need to get over it. You are talking about seeing yourself having a future with someone you don't even really KNOW. You are creating your own little imaginary world with him in it and you don't even know much about this man. Secondly, you are operating off of emotions. This guy is clearly being more logical than you are because he doesn't want to lose his job... which sounds pretty smart to me.

    You supposedly don't think you can get over this person, because you won't allow yourself to get over this person. Its very easy to live in a fantasy and avoid reality. And getting all worked up about the text messages is a little ridiculous. Once again, you're acting like you're dating the guy. I think you should stop this behavior because in the end, you're the only one is going to be disappointed. Good luck.

    • 1) I;m not living in a fantasy or imaginary world like you suggest. And I'm not operating off emotions. I know his opinion which is why I haven't done anything further and why I'm trying to GET OVER him. I'm being very logical about it too and have been listening to what he has to say.

      2) I'm not making a big deal about the texts. I'm just saying I"m nervous, which I am with everyone that I text.

      3) I won't stop this "behavior" because there is nothing I can stop.

    • Hahaha... if you say so. From your post, this is my opinion. But good luck to you.

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