Did I do the right thing? Does he not care?

I have been dating a guy for 2 months now.. and at the beginning, everything was perfect. He was funny, sweet, charming, and caring and we communicated well. Time went on..and he became more and more rigid towards me when we disagreed about anything. Like for the past 3 weeks.. every time we fight, he shuts down and pushes me away.. blames me for everything and says its my fault. Here's the kicker.. he never apologizes for anything.

One of the few time he did apologize he told me "it's a real D*** move, but I'm not all that sorry".. while I was crying. He's been talking to me less lately and not kissing me or even hugging me at all. I could tell he was not into it anymore.. and I started giving up too. We started fighting constantly and he would always shut down over the smallest things.. We broke up last night finally to end our misery.

I guess I needed to vent this to someone ..since we both have the same friends and it's now awkward for me to talk to them since they were his friends first. I feel like I may get pushed out of the circle of friends and I feel really sad because I like them all. I love him too.. but that doesn't mean anything to him anymore. I don't even know why or what I did to make him turn so cold to me. Do I just walk away from them all? My new friends included? They seem to still want me around, but it's just so awkward.

*I am so sorry about the long message.. I had to talk it out.. Like I said, there is no one I could tell this to at the moment and I had to tell someone..*

Thanks for the answers everyone. Looks like I did the right thing to cut them all off. Now I just need to figure out how to get myself back to normal.. Lol I guess this is the hard part.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Sweets, this guy obviously does NOT deserve your attention at all. While he may very well be a "nice" guy with his friends and stuff he doesn't sound like a great guy in terms of your relationship, I think that you guys did the right thing, you need to be with someone that's going to communicate with you, it shouldn't be all about him and the blame game because that's not fair you know? And as to having the same friends as he does, that's def. a hard spot to be in and one that I can sympathize with (my ex and I recently broke up and we share the SAME group of friends) all you can do is be nice and polite towards them because you had history together, but don't take it to heart if things are awkward for a while, you guys are still trying to sort out where you are now.. as a word of advice make sure you decide when enough is enough and how to spend your time, if you're hanging out with them and feeling down and he's ignoring you sometimes it's best to just get up, smile and leave. Best of luck.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • If you are fighting this early its not a great sign. I'd try to find someone else or at least take a break for a while


What Girls Said 3

  • Sounds like he is a narcissist.

    look it up on google

    they are really full on charming. amazing, everything you want in a boyfriend at the start. sweep you off their feet. then they just change. cold. uncaring. unempathetic. they just move on.

    this process can take a couple of weeks a couple months a couple of years to change depending on how they value you as a source of supply.

    just think of it as a blessing and a lesson girl =)

  • Obviously he has issues and he is a douche. I'm glad that you guys separated because it doesn't sound healthy. As far as you staying friends with his friends...maybe consider taking a break from them to HEAL yourself. Why? Because most likely they WILL Talk about him,they will bring up the breakup,and you most likely WILL end up seeing him when you don't want to.

    Make other friends...pick up hobbies that you put down while being in a relationship. I don't think its the best decision to continue with these mutual friends right now. Wait until you have healed more.

  • He's a loser, you did the right thing. You could remain friends with the mutual friends if you want and they don't mind but I wouldn't if it made you or them uncomfortable.


Recommended myTakes