I need help. Is this a stupid idea?

My ex and I had a pretty nasty break-up. We were off and on and there were a lot of problems since it was our first relationship and after the final break-up, we were both somehow really upset over it and fought for months after. Eventually I cut off all contact because he wouldn't try and resolve stuff like I wanted to and I wasn't getting over him that way. After I deleted him off all social media, I called him to explain why I had to because I wasn't getting over him this way and he got really angry and really mean. He kept asking me if I still cared but I lied and said no because at that point I was so emotionally exhausted of constantly fighting. He hung up on me. Then after a few months of no contact, he suddenly sought me out but by then I was too mad and ignored him.

I think he's dated someone in between and it's been more than a year since. I saw him in the library today and he was straight out pretending like he didn't see me and it just made me really sad because we used to get along so well. I actually do really miss him and I was thinking of just making a tentative move like snapchatting him but I'm worried that this may be a stupid idea. I don't want him to think I'm pathetic because I also tried really hard to work things out after our break-up to no avail, so I'm scared of him looking down on me for trying so often. But I also miss him and I don't want things to stay like this between us.



Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm sure you have heard the wise old expression in life: Let sleeping dogs lie. And this is One little doggie who needs to stay in his corner and never yap again.

    I call it fate that you were able to see him again after a year. It's a way to test you Now, as to what you should do, or what Could happen if you Do what you might think is what you want to do.

    Being that it was such a brutal break up and no one even ended up on a friend-zone planet, continue to move on, and don't start Now by digging up old bones, sweetie. You have nearly succeeded in passing the sign "Memory Lane," and he has been ruffing around, so you have heard. In essence, you both have gone down the dog walk of tomorrow, and to drum up a mere "yelp" may end up being one leash in life you will have to bite for thence on.


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What Guys Said 2

  • From what you say here. My opinion is yes it's a stupid idea.

    On again. Off again

    a lot of problems.

    You call him. He gets mad and hangs up.

    He contacts you. You were to mad and ignored him.

    He pretends he doesn't see you in the library.

    It's been over a year since the break up.

    Let it go. It's time to move on.

  • Do not make any attempts to contact him. It's over. Long over. You need to find a new man.


What Girls Said 3

  • Not worth it...move on until the two of you are more mature. And by then,you won't be thinking about him anymore...good luck.

  • Let the past be the past. He's a ghost from the past now. Stick to your words about trying to move on and stop being indecisive.

    • I'm going to try. I agree and thanks a lot for the answer.

    • You are most welcome, and good luck.. xx

  • Sounds like a lot of petty drama and mind games.

    I agree with ironeddie, sometimes you just have to know when it's time to get over all this, and move on with your life.

    • That was us at our worst but I don't think that that's all we ever were. I can't help but feel we still could get along, which makes me want to reach out.

    • If you think the two of you can actually get along then you're going to have to make that effort. But don't be surprised if he doesn't seem as willing to reciprocate.

    • A zebra never changes its stripes, at least not over nite..What you think he may be, you could find is Not, and end up in the same situation you were in a year ago. It has happened to me, and they don't change all that much..sometimes get worse.xx

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