What do I say to my friend who just filed for divorce?

My friend and I had a bit of a falling out a little over a year ago. I emailed her for the first time since then about two weeks ago. We've been in regular contact since then.

She just revealed that her husband, to whom she's been married since June, has been verbally and physically abusive and has cheated on her at least three times. She filed for divorce not long before I emailed her.

I feel terrible for how things turned out. What do I say to her? I feel like I should have been there for her.


Most Helpful Girl

  • doesn't matter what you could have, should have, would have done. You did not know what was going on and had a falling out. Concentrate on what you can do now. I am going through a divorce now, no one knew I had problems at home. I know some feel bad they couldn't "be there" for me. But they are now, and that is what you can do for her. Just listen, only give advice if she asks or appears to ask for it. Some want to give me advice, and honestly I know it is out of caring/love. However everyone reacts to things differntly so you can only guide really.


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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • I agree with my female counterpart. Don't worry about what you should have done. Focus on doing something now. what you can do is be there for her. Let her know if she needs anything from you, assure her that she shouldn't hesitate to ask you. Listen to her and try to cheer her up by doing fun things. At the same time though, this is a positive divorce; she is leaving a terrible situation.

  • be supportive


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