In a relationship, but in love with someone else?

I've been in a two years relationship with my boyfriend. For some months now I been working in a shoe store together with a guy that is everything I'm look for. He is tall, dark, charming, well dressed, kind, loving... My ideal guy, and we have a great chemistry and everyday we are becoming close to each other, something I love but at the same time hate. I love my boyfriend and do not plan on breaking up anytime soon, but at the same time I have the biggest crush on this guy. I feel bad for all this thoughts, but what can I do for it to disappear?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. You don't really know what your co-worker is like as a boyfriend, but you are assuming he is "everything you are looking for." What about your boyfriend--is he not everything you are looking for? This could be more about your attitude/feelings toward your boyfriend then about this other guy...

    Of course it's always possible to meet someone 'better' when you are with someone else. But you have to be absolutely sure the new person is really 'better', as opposed to you having doubts/fears/etc. about your current relationship which make this new guy look like the greatest guy in the world. And, even if the new guy is 'better' in some respects, until you are a couple for two years you will not really be able to compare him fairly to the boyfriend you have now...

    If you were really happy with your current boyfriend, it is unlikely you would be so attracted to this other guy. My advice is that you should to work through your feelings for your current boyfriend and discover what the problems are in this relationship (or within yourself--this co-worker could represent something new and exciting, while your current relationship may appear dull and boring, due to being two years old). Once you truly understand what is going on in your mind regarding your boyfriend, then this infatuation with your co-worker may disappear...

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What Guys Said 1

  • It's better the devil you know.

    Do not mistake work placed persona's as a person's persona. It is often completely different living with someone than working with them.

    Stick with your boyfriend and work through this. Tell this other dude you don't appreciate him flirting with you or just back away/ignore it. He is probably just bored in work and causing trouble.

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What Girls Said 5

  • It really doesn't sound like you are in love with the guy you work with. It sounds like a crush or infatuation. You're confusing a friendship with a guy with love. Its normal to have some level of feelings for other people, but it also might indicate a problem with your current boyfriend if you're equating the love of a 2 year relationship to someone you knew a few months at work.

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  • wait for a while, it could just be a crush. If it is a crush, it will go away with time. In the meantime, focus more on your bf. So that you don't forget or neglect him when you're amazed with this new "toy".

    And when the crush doesn't fade after enough time had passed, you need to make a decision. Either break up with your bf, or stay with your bf and get a new job where you don't see this guy anymore. Don't cheat!

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  • Make a decisión and stick to it. Personally, I'd stay with the 2 year bf, cause its not easy to find people to have long term relationships with.

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  • Choose one. Not easy but necessary. See if you can chiose from your heart and not what seems to be the right thing to do.

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  • You need to decide what you want

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