Is what I did considered to be cheating?

So a while ago I went out with some friends. Me and my boyfriend are currently in a long distance relationship, so we don't get to see each other very often. So I went to a club with two couples, and one of the guys decided to bring his guy friend with him (which I didn't know about). We were both sort of the ones left out, so we started talking. I got very, very drunk, and ended up doing some heavy grinding and dirty dancing with this guy. My boyfriend texted me while I was out, and I lied and told him that I was going to go dance with my girl friend, and I would call him when I got home. That's when this guy found out I had a boyfriend, but he didn't seem to care.

I told him no kissing, and although he tried several times, I always pulled away. But there was still some inappropriate touching, and once I started to sober up the guilt really set in. I got away from this guy and went in the bathroom to call my boyfriend. I didn't tell him about what happened, but I feel so extremely guilty now. Is what I did considered cheating? Should I tell my boyfriend about it? Thanks in advance!
Updates:
Also, me and my boyfriend had been fighting a lot, and I had my strong suspicions that he was cheating on me. So I was only using this guy to get back at him, but now I feel guilty about it all.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • yay for alcohol and poor judgement! helping guys get boners since always.

    you should tell him if you want to undermine your relationship, because you are only telling him to offload your guilt. in the greater scheme of things, what you did isn't that bad. but rather than ruin your relationship now, use your guilt to be a better human being.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Yes, you are cheating. I would break up with the LDR

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  • That would be cheating. You are explicitly lying with malicious intent.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Don't tell your boyfriend. If you were drunk then you weren't completely rational when you made the decision to let him touch you and when you touched him. Keep it to yourself and in the future remember not to drink around guys that aren't your boyfriend.

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  • I'd consider it cheating... but everyone has their own definition. My boyfriend and I define cheating as doing anything that we would exclusively do together with a member of the opposite gender... so that would include dancing... when my BF was out once he confessed a girl came up to him and started to dance but he walked away... I don't really even talk to other men unless it is for school or work.

    It is a LDR... so I'm not sure if there is a difference... I do have a friend that has done way worse than that and she is in an LDR with her fiance she is going to marry in a few months.

    I think in relationships it is best to be open and honest in all situations... because guilt can really eat away at you... maybe write a letter and read it to him explaining what happened... how you feel... and even bring up the suspicions you have about him cheating.

    Good luck!

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  • The question is how would you feel if he did what you did? Would you consider it cheating? All I know is that if you feel like you have to hide it its a form of emotional cheating. I know that if I did that my boyfriend would most likely break up with me or trust would be lost because you can't tell what they were feeling at that moments. If my bf did that to me, I would be extremely pissed and depending on how he brought it up see if I could get passed that. I would hate to find out by another person then the one who did it

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  • Just let it go and don't do it again.

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  • You obviously feel you have done something wrong because you are posting about it. So some part of you says that you did something wrong. I would just be honest and open with your boyfriend about everything that happened that night and go from there.

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