Why would a guy still talk to his ex daily and buy her presents and want to hang out with her all the time?

He will text or stop by daily
He says he doesn't have any romantic feelings but gets very emotional and cries when I try to say maybe we shouldn't be friends
He fights to stay in my life
He bought me a ticket to a show that I couldn't afford to go to. Spent, literally, his last dime doing so and came over and surprised me with it.
He is there for me no matter what I need and will go out of his way and cancel plans if I'm going through something and need to talk.
He tells me he misses me when we don't talk
We dated for 8 months and he said I was "the best girlfriend he's ever had"
We got along amazingly and always had so much fun together. We broke up because he said he was messed up and not over a break up he had with an ex 4 years ago and also said (out of anger) that he wasn't attracted to me but always used to call me pretty and sexy and our sex life was always good.

why would someone who doesn't have any romantic feelings go so out of their way for a girl? His actions are very different than what his words imply. Please help.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Actually, I disagree with you. A plausible explanation for his actions is, in my opinion, he has become attached and dependent upon you emotionally after dating you and spending time with you for eight months.

    In that sense, his behavior does not, necessarily, contradict his words. You said, and I quote, "he used to call me pretty," which, by my estimation, suggests that he may no longer, or for the time being, see you as potential partner. Be it not for him crying and breaking down emotionally and such when you hinted at ending things, he is, and has been, behaving and treating you as that of a valued friend or his best friend.

    After the breakup with you, has he attempted to engage in sexual related interactions with despite his claim of only wanting to be "just friends," with you? Does he attempt to interfere with you dating other guys or, in other words, has he ever become jealous of other guys in regards to you? If he did not, then perhaps he genuinely wants to be friends only with you and isn't stringing you along as KhaysunDei implied.

    • Excellent answer. +1

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    • Understood. After pondering this further, I believe a bit of jealousy and discomfort on his part should be expected when there is talk, etc., of guys being with you , especially if you two were intimate. It's common to have residual feelings for an ex shortly after a breakup. Nevertheless, if he has not tried to sabotage or interfere with you moving on to a new romantic relationship, then his request to remain platonic friends with you seems sincere. That said, don't assume anything. Accept a phone number or two, and date (s) even. If your ex wants to be with you, he will make a stand or at least state his intentions to be with you when in the very near future. If not, you should consider it his loss.

    • Well, he has asked me to go for a drink to talk tonight so we'll see what he has to say. I think I'm just going to play it cool and not ask how he feels unless he brings it up. I hope that's the best. So unsure of myself in this situation

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What Guys Said 2

  • pffft, you ever heard that a lot of divorced people want to remarry their first choice? He just can't make up his freakin mind, he's always on the fence deciding which side is greener. Give him an ultimatum: "Look here, be my eternal slave or get the F out of my life!"

  • You need to stop leading him on

    • How am I leading him on? I want to be around him and might want to get back together someday?

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    • I want to be with him he says he doesn't have feelings for me...I don't think you understand.

    • Then ignore him for a week or two no calls or texts no contact then you will know how he really feels

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