Why does it hurt so bad and what are some tips to move forward?

Why does it hurt so bad to let go of someone that you know is not right for you. Deep down I don’t want to let go but its what’s best for me. I know that we have all been through this. I feel like I need closure but it’s too late to repair our relationship because he hurt me so bad. It just seems the nicer you are the harder they let you fall.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Being nice and opening your emotions to just have someone crush them is painful, but the reason it hurts so bad, is because we all need to learn who to attract and who to stay away from, so when we hurt, this is our body, getting rid of all the poison we allowed in, it is your body rejecting them, and once it is over, we all learn a little, and we all go for someone better the next time, but if we fail to move on, then we are just filled with the rubbish, and our body never remembers what it deserves, and we end up allowing our selves to be treated like dirt, so don't fear the pain, this is our way of emptying all that is bad for us, and always move on, because this is us learning what our talents deserve, and we are all worthy of someone who will never hurt us in this way, x

    • Wow. You spoke right to my heart. It’s hard but when we keep allowing the rubbish to take over then at that moment it’s what we think we deserve but in reality we don’t we deserve so much more. Everyone gets hurts and it’s how we go about it to make us stronger. Thank you so much because that was amazing and spot on!!

      I did leave some things at his house and not sure how to go about getting them back. I asked if a date and time of when I could come get them but he never responded.

    • Show All
    • I have good morals and told him that it’s not fair to her that he drags her along. I told him that before that its probably not a good idea we hang out because I feel bad because he does have a GF and I don’t want people to look down on me for this. I wouldn’t want someone doing this to me because it just not fair. It’s just going to be hard because we are both on the same softball team all summer long and will be seeing a lot of each other.

    • Just remember your morals, and also try and realise that if its hard for you, then its likely to be hard for him, but just try and hide those emotions, because it is this that helps you move on. If this guy can't give you and solely you his time, then he's not a worthy choice, you deserve better, so make this his loss, not yours, x

Recommended Questions


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

What Girls Said 3

  • Gosh you sound like me. How long has it been since you broke up? I know how you feel, I still feel like that from time to time. I loved and cared about my ex so much, but I just felt his treatment of me was unacceptable and at times he didn't seem happy with me. So like you I let him go. To my surprise he said he loved me so much and that I really made him happy because nobody had ever cared for him like I had. But I felt the hurt had been done, and stuck to my guns. He moved on after only 3 weeks, I took 8 months.
    Somebody once told me that to get over someone, it takes the same amount of time you went out with them. I'm not sure whether that is true, but I was with my ex for a year and I think I will actually be over him after a year.

    But to ease your pain a little more. Remove all contact straight away. if you are still in contact with him, let him know and understand why you need to stop talking, to help you get over him. And cry, if you feel awful one day, don't hold it in, go into your room and cry your eyes out. You will eventually feel more peaceful and be able to take another step. At this stage you will have to take each day as it comes. Give yourself a target or goal each day to get something completed.

    Good luck :)

    • It’s been about 2 weeks and some days are better than others. Some days I’m so over it and happy as can be then other days brings me right back him. I have not contacted him, but it hurts knowing it was so easy for them to get over us when we did everything for them and would of done anything for them.

    • I also left some things at his house after all this happened and I want it back. I texted him to see when a good day would be I could stop by and grab it and no response.

  • You have to let go. You can't think of anyone but yourself at this point. If the damage is done, take stock of everything and give yourself permission to move on. It's not going to be easy but you will be a better person in the long run. And don't jump into another relationship, date yourself. I hope this helps

  • I completely agree with everything you wrote. It does seem that when you put your heart out there someone comes and just rips it to shreds for no good reason.

    Some tips: say "I LOVE ME" out loud, several times a day. Stop cyber-stalking.. do not look at his FB page, block him from Twitter.. all of that. Cry. And then cry some more. Get all of the tears out until you hyperventilate. Remember something you didn't like about him. Write in a journal abiut what you're feeling. Get out of bed. Go outside. Move. Talk to your friends. And when you're ready, go out.

    There is no time limit for getting over someone. Dont put pressure on yourself. Some days will be better than others. You are special and you deserve someone that will not hurt you and love you like you will them.

    • By the way, a lot of the pain you're feeling comes from being rejected. But rejection is a blessing in diguise. Think of all of the great things that are about to come out of this: you might lose weight, change your hairstyle, make new friends, focus on something you love but gave up because of him, help other women that will go through something similar.

    • I totally agree, It just hurts knowing someone you cared so much about can just walk away with no remorse. I know he is not what’s best for me but a big part of me is like just give him another chance but he does not deserve it at all!! He doesn’t deserve it trust me but I think I just want what I can’t have.

    • You are so right!! I feel like I am being rejected and it hurts. No one likes to be rejected. I have been trying new things and have met new people. Reading that was really encouraging and absolutely so true.

Recommended myTakes