I am not quite ready to date, still enjoying my freedom.
But those I've gotten close to-- I feel so empty when we are out of touch.
I am a "loner" and know how to be alone. But there is something nice about sharing my time with someone. At first I always feel a bit miffed to have someone come in on my solitude. Then I get used to the contact.
So I think about a real relationship and will I feel dependent on them, or so upset if it doesn't work out?
I'm 30, married my high school sweetheart. Haven't dated before.. I'm just afraid to get too close to anyone.
Can anyone relate or offer any wisdom on this?
Most Helpful Guy
Yes. I am 45. My wife divorced me after 25 years together and 20 years of marriage. I didn't want anything to do with divorce, I wanted her to fight for our marriage. she quit. Then she has completely thrown me away. she tries her best to make it seem I never existed. she would do an say things every week or two that were painful and just done to get a reaction from me and hurt me as much as possible. The last thing she threw in my face was she cheated at the very end of our marriage. even though our final date was already set. I have been completely destroyed during this process.
I can literally count on one hand the number of women I have gone out with in my life. I went on dates but never dated, never had an actual GF. I had one drunken thing when I lost my virginity then I met my ex-wife. other then a year in the military I lived at home until I married.
So I am 45, been with 2 women in my life, have no idea how to date, never lived on my own, completely devastated. I mean Nobody wanted me when I was young, thin and had hair. Nobody is going to want me looking like I do. I am not someone any woman will want.
I was lost until she threw that fact that she cheated at me. I really did lose it but that caused me to bottom out. It pushed me past a mental block I have had and I have been a different person since. I was able to channel the devestation into anger. I realize she can only hurt me if I allow her to hurt me.
SO I was at the gym last week Monday and saw someone I thought I recognized from school. I decided "screw it" and just went up and talked to her. We really hit it off. we have been on a few dates in the last 9 days. up until 2 days ago I was so happy I couldn't believe it.
**** if you could please do a search for my question that is called:
Ladies, is it over before it began?
she has helped me get past this deep depression and made me happier then I have been in years. You just need to choose to be happy.