8months no contact then ex turns up help!!?

Ok quick low down
I dated a guy 9 years older than me i played step mom to his 2 kids he played step dad to my little 1
Got on great with each others friends and family often went out with them and the kids and also as a couple.
We always made each other smile even with the smallest of things we saw each other everyday and neither one of us could stand being apart
We both were committed n people often commented it was a perfect relationship and how happy we both were as we never argued if we had a problem we spoke and then cheered the other one up within minutes
Then 1day he ups n leaves no reason that was 8months ago, he soon started hanging around my bro they are now best buds n we hadn't spoke in 6months then 2nights ago he shows up we had a catch up it was like nothing had wrong and we soon ended up in bed but i havnt got a clue whats happening as he foesnt want a relationship else he wudnt of walked away i do still love him tho
I am not a clingy controlling or moaning woman im chilled out exactly like him n he knew he hurt me as he kept kissing and hugging me the day he left n for a man who doesn't show emotion he cried when he split with me which made me think he must still love me but then to hear nothing for so long surely his feelings have gone?
Is it because he lost a close family member that he felt lonely or it made him realise? Please dont say ask him as his feelings he never speaks about he is a mans man

Confused!! Break up? Reconciliation?


Most Helpful Girl

  • im sure he still has feelings for you and want you in his life in some way I think he was going threw a lot at the time and that's why he broke it off he didn't want to put his problems on you I think he was way to stressed out and had family stuff going on that maybe was overwhelming and stressful for him but I feel him being friends with your brother shows that he cares for you and your family because he stayed in contact with someone who means a lot to you witch is your brother ik you don't wanna ask him his feelings but maybe you reaching out to your brother and seeing how he feels by asking your brother im sure your brother will be completely honest with you and tell you the truth after all he's your brother he will be there for you no matter what so maybe asking him would be the best because your probably isn't going to tell him and who knows your ex could have asked a lot about you to your brother and give it time with your ex by keeping in contact an reconnecting again slowly allow him to come to you when he's ready but the best thing to do is show interest by flirtying and being there for him especially if before he felt alone you being there will mean a lot to him


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • he is feeling lonely or has no one to cover for you at the moment. dont do it.

    he either should commit fully or no go

  • Im in that situation, she is like a unicorn :(


What Girls Said 1

  • You are not controlling. Sadly he is the one pulling your strings. Ask him those questions. You slept with him again the moment he appeared in life, therefore you should be able to demand clarification.
    Be more selective of whom you introduce to your child's life.
    You maybe causing harm to him/ her

    • No he didn't meet her straight away i wouldn't do that and she hasn't seen him when this happned i know we shouldn't of ended up in bed, but we were tlking like old times and the flirting begun n when he kissed me he even said that he didn't think that would happen n i could kick myself mayb i was lonely and he was but y do we always end up bk in each others arms?

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    • Well i really did think he was the one he is the only partner of mine she has ever met he had a long discussion and i thought it was the right decission and i slways put her first and thank you i understand what your saying i think i have some thinking to do

    • No worries, there is always a chance to correct mistakes. Treat this as such and you won't go wrong.