Is it alright for guys to hang out with their friend who is a girl if they are dating?

I recently made a boyfriend but yesterday he told me that he went to surprise his friend at her shop to pick her up and had dinner with her. He said that it is because she lives on the way to his house, as he drives a car and the train she catches had track work. I don't catch trains much so I assume that it'll take longer for her to get home? But he also didn't want to have dinner by himself.

Anyway, I felt upset about that and told him that it sounded like he went on a date with her, though he said that I am the only girl in his heart.

Would this be considered cheating if he does it again? Spending time with a girl one on one? He told me about it though and apologised but I am worried that he will do it again. He is a really nice person and is generous to everyone.
But I don't think he understands how much that hurt me and I don't think he is doing it with bad intentions.

Am I selfish in thinking this way?
Thank you for reading.

Could you give me advice on what I should do? Or if you were in a similar situation, what would you do?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Maybe I'm an insensitve douche, but I honestly would not see anything wrong here. I'll have lunch and dinner with friends if I feel like it, be they male or female. Personaly I'd invite my girlfriend along if I think she whould enjoy the company but as long as he told you I'd think nothing of it. If he didn't tell you or tried to hide it is when you should be getting worried.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Guys are allowed to have friends. Having a close friend that's female is nothing ground breaking. I'm going to go with the you overreacted vote.

    • I see. Thank you for your answer.

  • i dont think its ok. if anything he should have invited you to that dinner too. that is what i would have done if i wanted to help a female friend.

    • Thank you for your answer. He said that he wished that I was there. I couldn't go to an event that was on that day as I had work for assignments. But he dropped over to see me for an hour that morning to see me.

    • Show All
    • I hope he doesn't. He's my first boyfriend and I don't know how things should be going. My parents also think I am rushing into it.

    • i wouldn't say you were overreacting. he screwed up and it upset you , you had every right reacting the way you did

  • No, is not OK.

    • Thank you for your answer. But I feel like if I tell him, he would think I am being unreasonable as he is trying to help a friend.

What Girls Said 2

  • No. If that was my boyfriend, I'd be pretty upset too. Like seriously. He should have invited you or asked you if you approved first. It seems like him doing this is only a one time thing, and if he does it again then yes, I would consider it 'cheating' in a way.

    • Thank you for your answer. My eyes were really swollen this morning as I had cried most of the night and I thought I was overreacting. I hope it is a one time thing.

    • You're welcome. I'm sorry you were crying! I've been there. Hope you feel better.

    • Thank you >_< I feel better today. We still talk and chat often. I understand now when people sat boyfriends are a big distraction :p
      Hope you have a nice day.

  • No, that is not okay.

    • I see. Thank you for your answer.