Should I feel like I was used?

I knew a guy from uni with whom I had mutual friends that I used to hang out with. I liked him and told him so at the end of the year after we had left for summer but he said he just liked me as a friend. The next year some close mutual friends had left so we started hanging out together just us, eventually we ended up hooking up too but just light hook ups with no sex. Its 2 years later now and we both have moved to different countries but occasionally send a message or two. My question is do you think he was using me after he knew i liked him. I don't feel used because we used to do normal friends stuff like going for a walk or dinner at the same time that we used to hookup. Was he using my feelings for him or was he just continuing the friendship. Didn't worry about it until I spoke to him and he brought up something that happened while we were hooking up that was funny but it made me feel slightly uncomfortable when he brought it up on the call. Why bring it up?


Most Helpful Guy

  • What kind of things did y'all talk about? He might have been talking to other girls more, and might have never gotten around to hooking up with you. He might have been just trying to figure girls out. I think its highly unusual for a guy to have female friends without having at least some interest, but its usually smart to talk to a few different girls, because you never know who might be available. I suppose it is possible he just thought of you as a friend, but that seems odd.

    • We talked about interesting stuff that we had heard about from aliens to dinosaurs. And just deep meaning of life kind of stuff including what types of futures we wanted career wise and family wise. He's just the type that asks rather deep questions anyway regardless of who he's talking to.

    • While he probably is a deep thinker, he talked about futures with YOU. Not something a guy generally does with just any girl. Still, he may have been talking to someone else more. Or maybe yall's future plans didn't seem compatible enough. And college is one of those areas where sometimes relationships don't go but so far, because of distance in the future.

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What Guys Said 1

  • He wasn't using you. You say that yourself.


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