Money, love, and relationships?

Thanks for taking your time reading this
So well i have been with my girlfriend for the past 4 months we both are in college and we love each other thats for sure and love to be with each other... But there's an issue i need to solve, everytime we go out that involves spending money and thats something i dont have. I am at the point where i need to work. The thing is, i study and i want to end my carrer in time, making it hard for me to decide what to do.

So i want to work to have money to go out but if i work i have to get less hours of school to have time for both school and work... Making it impossible for me and my girlfriend to see each other... Im in panic cause i want to do this for her so we can go out but that would mean not seeing her as frequently and im affraid in the time im not arround her she will found someone charmin who has money to go out and eventually fall in love with him... I feel ashamed of myself for not having money, not because i care of money but things like, bouling, diner, icecream, gifts, flowers, trips, gas for moving somewhere cost. I feel bad cause i see myself as a guy who can't give that special girl what she deserves, she is a sweetheart and treats me very nice.

I need help!!! some advice on what to do, some words to clear my mind, i dont want to lose her, its just a short time we've been dating but im taking it very seriously. We talk about problems, we help each other we understand and accept each other, still we have talk on what things like attitudes try to change to make things better and most of all WE TRUST AND RESPECT each other, the relationship and ourselfs...

Sure i will talk about this with her but i need something in the meantime to make me feel a bit better.

Again thanks for taking your time it means a lot to me THANK YOU


Most Helpful Girl

  • It's extremely sweet that you try and give her what you think she deserves, but a relationship doesn't need a lot of money. Make sure that you don't get too caught up in your job that you can't spend enough time with her. The most important thing in a relationship that you can give is your time. Whether it be sitting at home watching movies, or going on a walk. The better things in life shouldn't be remembered for how much they cost, but for how much it meant to them. You should spend some money on her, but explain to her that you are financially tight. Find ways to spend time with her in which you don't have to use a lot of money. Take her on special dates not every time you hang out, but maybe once a month or once every couple weeks.

    • Thanks a lot, you seem to be very nice, im someone who overthinks a lot even more in cases like these, she is very important to me and i get nervous about loosing her and thats when my mind rather than helping, harms me...

      Your words really calmed me down thanks

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • It doesn't sound like she's contributing financially when you guys go out. Are you the only one that ever pays?

    Why don't you do some free activities?

    • She sometimes pays but when things are cheaper but still it makes me feel uncomfortable, i really dont know why and we do free activities as well but sometimes that she ask me to go out i can't really tell her i have no money. Im shure she wouldn't mind... THE PROBLEM IS ME i feel less, i see myself as the responsable of that aspect of the relationship... Sometimes she pays when i have money and i dont care but when i dont have thats when i feel she is taking care of something I should.

What Guys Said 1

  • You have three options:
    1) Spend less money on dates.
    2) Tell her she needs to chip in.
    3) Get a job.

    I'd opt for number 2 quite frankly.

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