My flatmate and I have made out 3 times more intimate each time but she says she can't see any future in it. Can she really have no feelings for me?

Hi. Since Feb, my flatmate and I have made out 3 times (pretty much 2 months to the day from the previous event each time). Each time it has lasted longer and got more intimate, so much so that last time we ended up having sex. She says we should stop as she cannot see us as a couple. Each time has involved alcohol and was mutually initiated, in fact she probably was the more involved.

She says she cares for me a lot but can she really have no feelings romantically for me? Or is this a defence mechanism? If she wants to remain as friends instead I am happy with that but would like to know where I stand as I may have fallen for her and need to stop quick if it is truly not to be


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What Girls Said 2

  • I think she doesn't think you belong together because each time you guys have hooked up you've been drunk. I think the alcohol may have clouded the clarity of how she really feels for you, so she's rejecting it because she might not be understanding her feelings.

    • Its that its happened more than once that has got me questioning but yeah alcohol can just make us do things

  • With alcohol involved it could go either way. I've had that, granted we never got that far but while sober I consider him a true friend, drunk I just wanted to jump his bones. I suggest no more drunken sex whether you want it or not find away to not do it. If she wants to have sex with you tell her she needs to be sober if she can't do it then, I really hate say it but you're in friend zone.

    • I kind of had that feeling but good to get a female perspective especially as not felt this way for a girl before and so its all new to me. Kind of sucks if it does go that way (which sounds like it prob will) but I'm sure I'll be able to be fully just friends again if it is meant to be that way. Definitely don't want to loose her as a friend as she means too much to me (and that's without the attraction)

    • You seem like a nice guy, so on behalf of the female species I apologize you have to go through this.

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