Strictly friend with benifits or is he starting to come around?

Me n my ex broke up recently but i went back to him wanting friends with benefits with this dumb hope we may get back together one day. He used to only hit me up when he wanted sex but now he's texting almost everyday. That got me a little happy. Then my friend, i guess to prove a point , asked him what out relationship meant to him n he said" she means something to me but its just casual dating and sex thats all" it hurt me to hear that. it also hurt me that when i ask randomly if he wants to go eat or do something he doesn't really respond. Nor does he ask if i want to do anything... For his bday i treated him to a day and he told me how much it meant to him but then my bday comes by and he just wishes me a happy bday n we had sex... Whenever i try to distance myself he reaches out and seems to push himself back in? I don't know what i should do half of me whats to just let things be but the other half is tired of being treated like this when it never used to be this way... what does he want?


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What Guys Said 2

  • he wants exactly what he's showing. a casual sex based relationship, and it seems you knew this getting into but as you said, were sort of foolishly hoping that something more would come of it.

    I don't know the statistics but I've seen the experiment (college is a great place for such things) and more often than not casual sex relationships do not lead anywhere but to frustration or one person being hurt while the other is oblivious to why.

    I think if you want something more you need to see if he is willing to do that but expect that he will say no. If he says no you need to move on otherwise I think you are going to continue being hurt by his actions... but he isn't at fault.

    • I just understand how i could mean something to him and there not be anything there

    • Dont understand

    • if he doesn't want a relationship, or perhaps is looking for something abit different in an exclusive sort of bf/gf sort of relationship you could certainly mean something to him but not see anything more than the status quo.

  • It sounds like he wants sex and nothing more. He knows that he's got you on a leash and that you'll stay there. He's using you and your falling for it like a horny schoolgirl. He's going to keep you around until he finds someone else. You should leave him now. It'll only lead to heartbreak.


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