Why can't I ever catch a break with women?

I don't know anymore if it's me that's really so bad that I never deserve to meet someone and have a frigging normal relationship just once.
I don't think I'm that bad. I try to be nice to people I try not to insult or hurt anybody by being who I am. I have skills I mean I'm smart, I'm educated, I can take care of myself I can do almost anything I set my mind to. I speak multiple languages that I learned each in a couple of months. I can do house work and cook and saw on the other hand I can build a house or fix a car. I can do accounting and program webpages and software. I can dance literally to any music in a pair or solo I can sing and play multiple instruments. I can drive a car a truck a boat even fly a plane. I know this because I've done all of the above and much more.
I'm not rich but situated enough.
I've never forgotten a birthday of a woman or anniversary I remember frigging details about every little crappy thing about my girl and pay attention to everything. I'm good to them I treat them nice I've been told that I'm a really good lover and the best man a woman would ever want in her life. They've told me that they feel like they're the most important thing on the face of the planet when they're with me and that it's so easy to fall in love with me.
Then way the hell do all the women I like turn into crazy psychos and want to hurt me and rip my heart apart.
I had a gf for 8 years we broke up and it jst went down hill from there.
The last one was different she actually was with me but turned out cheated on her boyfriend to be with me. But she told me she was in love with me and I frigging felt it like I have never felt it before. But in staid of choosing me she choose to go back to a guy she doesn't love and he doesn't love her. She said she has never felt that much in love but told me to get out of her life
So what's wrong with me?
Why can't I find a normal woman who would love me and want to stay with me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You should master the art of elenchus, just have conversations with girl friends and see how they respond and how they act. Engage in conversations that gets them very passionate, say politics, philosophy, religion etc., and see how they handle it, do they get upset? Are they judgmental? Just weed out the ones who seem like they're troublesome and eventually you'll hit the jackpot.

    • See that's just the thing. I do all that and at first they all seem great and then we get more involved and we start to fall in love for one another and boom like a bowling ball shit hit's the fan they turn into psychoses.
      It feel literally like they're falling in love with me and when I fall in love with them and we have an amazing time then they get scared of something and retreat so far back that they treat me worse than if I was a peace of trash they would never look at in a million years.
      This is after we've been going out hung out together gotten to know each other slept together told each other that we're in love.
      Always some kind of weird story like this.
      The last one really took the cake with this one she actually told me she loved me and broke up with her boyfriend (I didn't know she had one) but then got scared of something and now completely isolated me out of her life after 10 months of a great relationship.

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    • You're right. Currently I just can't think of a way to get back even near her. I guess I'll have to figure out something.
      Thanks for the advice.

    • No problem.

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What Girls Said 2

  • You seem like a great guy some woman would want :) You'll find the right one that appreciates you some day! Besides that, there aren't too many details of what went wrong or what. Might've been just who you chose and 8 years is a long time so you must've been doing something right in that time frame!

    • Thank you.
      Yeah I don't know my ex the one I was with for 8 years says that I was the best guy she had ever been with and that any woman would be lucky to have me. Not to be bragging or anything we're really good friends and she just recently meat a guy who she says reminded her of how great I used to treat her. She's so angry at this girl that I was with recently for treating me so badly.
      To be honest I don't actually know what went wrong I guess she got scared that she might get hurt if she was too involved. I don't know because she just picked up and left like she panicked and I don't think it was anything I did. Besides it's a really long story. But it's really too bad because I really felt that this girl was the love of my life and she thought so to at one point. I still do I just don't know what I can do to get her back.

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    • Oh wow. That's a lot I guess, esp if the best friend is even saying that. They probably even talked about it too and the friend doesn't even know what's going on! Since the signs are so clear you're a great guy!

    • Yeah. I don't know what to think. Her friend says that she'll support her with any decision she makes but I think she thinks that my girl is in love with me and that it's not good for her to have made such a decision and she said that if she even gets a hint that she might not be happy she's going to tell her to go back to me and just trust me that I'll make her happy. She said that she knows I made her happier than she ever was before and that she doesn't know what happened to make her decide in such a bad way. She said she was determent and is trying to put her focus into things without me. I just hope she's having the same problems as I am and that she might come back.
      I don't know if I'm a great guy all I know that I never want to give up on people especially on people I love and I'd never give up on her. Never and I'd give everything I can just to make her happy because if I could make her happy with me I'd be happy too.

  • Start evaluating how you choose these women. Something you pick out is in common. Getting involved with a cheater, for instance, is anyways a red flag.

    • I agree with you on that and I would have never considered getting involved with her if I knew she was involved. I never even thought about it because everything was going along so great. But then when we already were involved I could sense that she was falling in love with me and I knew she had problems in the past.
      I don't know how I choose these women I think that they choose me since I don't think I've ever been able to get a woman interested in me that wasn't already interested in me.

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    • There must be a common thread with their personalities...

    • If there is I can't find one. :(

What Guys Said 1

  • most women think 80% of men are ugly. thats the first problem