Is this a fling, a weird dating phase, or?

I've been seeing a distant coworker of mine (different buildings/depts) for several months for coffee, dinner breaks, and drinks after work, just the two of us. He asked me to dinner and a movie a few days ago and as soon as we got there he asserted that "this is not a date, just us hanging out". Despite that, we spent dinner getting to know each other better, and even joked and whispered throughout the movie. He seems genuinely interested me but I don't understand the motive behind saying this to me.

We've spent two nights (sex, etc) at his place together already, and I can't understand whether he sees this as a fling or something more. Why would a guy feel the need to assert that us hanging out alone is not a date after so much of the opposite behavior?

For more context, he's specifically said to me a few weeks ago that he really likes me, but I've been living with my ex, and he doesn't want complicated. (I'm moving out tomorrow!) My guess is he's holding off till I'm settled and fully independent?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Coz he would never commit to you and does not want you to have any false expectations. He wants to continue this till he enjoys sex with you and then would move on when he gets a better option. Simple..


What Girls Said 1

  • maybe he wanted you as fuck buddy only

    • I'm a bit worried about this as well, but he keeps spending time with me alone doing things that are *not* sex. We talk more than ever, and he shows genuine interest in my work, my aspirations, etc.

    • he is sending too much mixed signals