Girls that go on dating sites to "just talk" to people?

So to sum it up:

- I met this amazing girl online, a lot has happened, and right now she doesn't wanna date because she is getting professional help for her problems (she actually went out of her way to hand me a receipt of a place she went to). Again, she initially liked me, but right now needs time to herself

- I did notice however, she is active on the dating site we met on. when i asked her about this, she wasn't defensive, she simply said "Because i like to just talk to people, and find other people to play online with" (she's an online gamer, like me)

That just sounds weird to me, because how do i know if she's still on the look out or not (cause its a dating website)? and its a DATING site, guys will hit on her. what if she finds someone she ends up liking more then me?

She's been totally open and honest with me, so i suppose all i can do is trust her word, but still im skeptical :(

I do recall asking her, a week after that above convo (asking her why she's still on there), if she's actually met/flirted with anyone off there and she assured me she's not/hasnt

i'm kinda thinking of making a fake profile to message her and ask "what she's looking for" but i feel that would continue to make me unnecessarily paranoid

Anyway opinions guys/girls?

  • dont be paranoid, she's not doing anything wrong
    Vote A
  • be paranoid
    Vote B
  • other (post what)
    Vote C
Select a gender to cast your vote:
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Also: I did notice she has updated her profile a bit. just little details about her. her profile still shows as "looking for a relationship", but her pictures on there are 3 years old. i guess it's better then recent pictures up, as if she's looking
She DID have recent pictures up, before her "problems" started happening, and now it seems she took them down (and adjusted her profile abit) and simply has 3 year old pictures up (and she continues to talk to me, although doesn't flirt)


Most Helpful Guy

  • She liked you, but doesn't anymore. Yes, it's as simple as that. Just because she'll still talk with you, does not mean she still kinda likes you. That's not an indicator.

    I don't understand about being "paranoid". Yeah, she pretty much stretched the truth -- of course. Honest people do that. She doesn't want to feel bad. There's some truth to what she's saying, but I hate to break it to ya: Yeah, she's on a DATING SITE. It doesn't mean she's looking for a boyfriend -- which she knows she's not ready for -- but new people to merely hang with in person is good.

    She probably sensed you were more into her than she was into you, and that turned her away -- she's not emotionally ready for that -- whether she has a counselor or not -- that was just to re-inforce things, that's all.

    You should just walk away. She doesn't want to date anymore -- what good is hanging in the background going to do? Yeah, she's going to get the D from another guy at some point in the not too distant future. She's keeping her options open. Your situation closed out -- move on. Don't cling to it or get wrapped up that she told you things that were both true & not-so-true. You'll be kicking yourself for hanging around!

    • She does like me still, it's not just the fact she still talks to me.

    • Show All
    • Hey there, thank you for your opinion. and no, thats not sarcasm.

      so she told me she's had the plenty of fish app for 4 years straight, and it ALWAYS shows her as online. she's obviously had boyfriends within those 4 years. also, she said to me "thats not the first time someone has confronted me"

      so what does this all mean?

    • The POF app will show one's online when they're not -- true. It will always show you Online *if* you use it frequently enough. When I used POF quite frequently, there was no one person who was ALWAYS marked as Online every single time I was on there (but some almost all the time). But yes, it takes a good long while to time out -- but again, that requires active usage. So she is admitting she Actively, Frequently uses it without knowing she is.

      "thats not the first time someone has confronted me" -- if in response to the above, then she's being defensive. She's trying to downplay that she's on POF so much. She's downplaying her hunt for boys.

      My point is that you don't go on Dating Sites to *Solely* find online gamers. That's pure and utter BS. Like seeing a gal on POF who has a BF and says she's loyal and loves him and is only on there looking for friends -- yet stays on there. BS.

      That girl doesn't want to hurt your feelings and doesn't want to feel like a player.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • If she is visiting dating sites, she keeps looking. Move on

  • I think she likes you more as a friend than boyfriend

    • why?

    • She still has his dating site profile, so she talking to other guys and she will likely try to find a guy who is similar to you but has that one thing/personality trail that another guy has that you might lack, so until then or when she becomes suddenly distant you will remain her bf

What Guys Said 3

  • The second she said "I don't want to date you" you should have bounced.

  • there's a reason why u she's online otherwise she wouldn't cuz withoit no ome talken to u on there, its pointless to go online. My best bet is... she's flirting with other guys on their. Make a fake account and u will see what i mean.

  • This is what you call an attention whore. She likely has daddy issues. Move on.