Apologies for the long post, but I'll really appreciate it if you can answer, and I'll make sure to give a best answer. Thanks.
There's this girl I went out on a date with twice. She was on a gap year from the Netherlands.
I wasn't interested in her at first, she got my attention. She seemed to be doing loads of things that showed she liked me.
For example always making an effort to sit next to me, asking for my number, texting me to see if was going to things when she already knew I was, liking years old (6/7 years old) Facebook posts, etc.
So I started to develop feelings for her. I asked her out (December), we went out a few times.
She then realised she was going to be returning home in May, so we sort of stopped dating, but remained very close. She wanted to stay for another year, but it didn't work out.
I feel like she kinda left when our relationship was just beginning, and thus I don't really know 'what we were'.
I feel like had she stayed around, we would probably have been 'together' by now.
Everyone around us thought we were together already. They could see that we liked each other. People asked if she was my girlfriend and vice versa. People still ask me now questions like; "how are you coping with your girlfriend being in another country".
Her friend told me she liked her.
I was pretty confident that all the effort was worth it, that 'we were going somewhere' (if it wasn't for her leaving), until last weekend when I asked one of her friends (not a best friend, but still close enough), if she ever talked about me.
The friend said they never really discussed it (not sure if thats true?), but she mentioned once that we were 'friends'.
I'm not sure at what stage of me knowing her, that was said.
But now I'm confused. What if she only saw me as a friend? It doesn't seem that way, but I don't know. The not knowing drives me nuts. Was all the effort I put in, was it all for nothing?
What's the point of it all?
What do you think of the friend, is she hiding something? Should I ask more questions, and ask at what stage was the 'friend' comment was made?
Most Helpful Girl
I think that hearing something from a friend is a little less reliable than hearing it from the person. What if she does talk about you a lot and she just talks to someone else about it? What if she really likes you, but doesn't trust her friends to keep a secret? What if she is just not in the habit of talking about who she likes? (some people are like that) You see, this is why you shouldn't worry too much about what the friend said. Friends that aren't actually involved in the romance are prone to forgetting things and not realizing what might be important. Don't let things crumble around what the friend said.
I would base my opinion of whether or not someone liked me mostly on the things I actually see the person do, words I actually hear the person say, feelings the person actually conveyed.
Now one final thought: perhaps she liked you, but in the back of her mind she knew she would be leaving, so she purposefully avoided letting the relationship go too far because she didn't want hearts to be broken when that time came. From what you have reported, it doesn't seem to me like she is the type of girl that would play games with you. It sounds like she just liked you, but unfortunately, she was going to have to leave and she knew it.0