So confused! Let's be friends first?

Iv'e been seeing this guy for a few months now, and by seeing I mean we've hung out a lot and I've slept over at his house... we haven't had sex yet, we've cuddled and kissed a few times, then he said "I think we should slow down because im not ready for the full on relationship thing and thats where it seems to be heading, lets be friends first"... and we still talk and hang out and cuddle and when he said the friends first thing was like a week ago... so I guess my question is, am I waisting my time, is he playing me? or is he a ginuine guy that wants to get to know me first before a relationship? and if so, how long are we gonna be friends before he decides to take it to the next level?


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What Guys Said 2

  • It's tough to say, no one knows what's really going in his head.

    I feel as if that's just an easy way to let someone down though, where the person just doesn't want to see the other get hurt. That's not how it works though, they will be hurt and the person can't help! So it does more damage than good, which MAY be what he's doing.

    Since he's still hanging out with you, cuddling, could be different things. Like he doesn't want to label anything just yet, or that he wants the benefits of a relationship without the constraints.

    Pretty soon though you have to ask where you're at, given that "getting to know each other" has been happening still, because you don't want to be disappointed in the end.

    • Thanks. I've never had this happen before. And it really sucks. I hope that thats not what's happening. Im gonna ask him tomorrow because I dont know how much more I can take

  • I think it's sort of rude to say you're just friends, then go on like that was never said, no wonder you're confused since he's basically stringing you along.

    Most of the time that's said, it's not really about getting to know the other person first, because you do that while dating, or even without saying it at all.


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