I dont know what to believe? Is this girl playing games with me?

So I knew this girl for 3 months. In the beginning she was totally into me and outright said she's looking for a long term thing right now. She's also done/said some stuff that suggests she was ONLY focused on me too

About half way into knowing her (month and a half) we finally met up and had a blast. it wasn't a "maybe she sorta likes me" i got all the usual positive signs of a girl being into me. At the end though i made a joke about her kissing me and she walked away to her house door (from my car) with a smile and joked with me that i drove pretty bad

Later that night she told me, on the phone, she doesn't wanna hang with me because she doesn't wanna develop feelings or get into a relationship while she works on getting better. She's an alcoholic, and according to AA, they shouldn't date for a year. Fair enough, i believed her.

Why did i believe her and not think its a rejection line? Its not like we had a crappy date and she used that to blow me off, she was definitely into me 100% and even asked me to hang out the next day (and also asked to come over my house some time). Plus as i said, she was into me for about 3 months

We ended up not working out cause she was just a drama causer a month later, but then it hit me... i put 2 and 2 together... she hung out with "A new guy" she's never met before recently. Not only that, i saw a week ago she's back on the dating site i met her on.

I'm totally confused. During my very last phone call with her i asked her "so was it an excuse? you telling me you dont wanna date right now and wanna stay single?" and she told me "im gonna lie and say it was so you f*ck off" (meaning she told the truth about wanting to stay single and not date)

What also confuses me (judge me later lmao) was that i made a fake account (when i saw she was back on the dating site) and asked her what she was looking for, mid convo, and she said "Friends to turn into something more"

I'm totally lost and confused. Did she play me?

  • played you
    Vote A
  • over thinking it/other possibility
    Vote B
  • other (post what)
    Vote C
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
in my opinion it's:

She's a good actor at pretending to like me, and strung me along (hence the "i dont wanna date anyone right now"
She changed her mind within a short time period

but also.. she's in AA. she really cannot date for a yr


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm sure that you were hurt, but you got to understand "that I don't want to develop feelings" is a poor excuse. Yes, she should not be dating for a year, then why is she putting herself on a dating site? Those two don't make sense. Don't take it personal, take it as a gift that she does not want to pursue something serious. You want a relationship where both are EQUALLY interested and willing to take the next step, otherwise it will be an unhappy relationship. Best of luck.

    • it is a poor excuse, but as i said, i up front asked her "Is that an excuse? or legit?" and she said it was legit.

      And i completely agree, why is she back on there? And yes I have actual proof she IS a recovering alcoholic (i've met her sponsor who is really nice)

      Anyway so do you think i got played? or what do you think is going on in her head?

    • Show All
    • Also she was hanging with a new guy too, and did stuff with him, and is on the dating site too. So maybe she's playing him too?

    • also me and her never actually kissed , i made a joke suggesting we should

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 3

  • It's like the Pick Up Artists say...

    You weren't emitting any Alpha-ness. She liked you but didn't want to fuck you. Therefore the relationship didn't get anywhere.

    I been there dude. Just learn to recognize the bullshit and move on quickly. Pretty soon you'll see that they'll start chasing you because of it.

  • Hmmmmmm. That is confusing, but I don't think she played you. I think she believes you are too good for her and she doesn't want that. She seems to really not want a long term, lasting, exclusive, relationship. I think she's just looking for a friend to hang out with. Maybe friends with benefits. You offered her more than she wants.

  • Yep she played you.

    The best thing to do is to move on and look for someone else.

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