Would you tell a girl that you're going out with another girl?

There's 2 girls in my life - one is my ex that wants to get back with me again, the other is a girl I'm trying to woo.

My ex knows about the other girl, and she's fine with it (mainly because she was the one who rejected me in the first place). She wants the other girl to know about the situation though, because she's also "another party in this situation, and so she deserves to know".

The other girl is clueless. I've been pretty naive, lovestruck, and focused on her. She's very traditional on bgr (no touching allowed), and dating is totally not her priority in life right now. She is interested in me though, and I guess I was pretty sincere and intense, because she's making time for me despite everything, including revealing what she thought about love and romance. But all the same, no touching allowed, and no dating. And also giving her time and space for her life. But all else is fine.

Now I haven't made my choice which girl to choose yet. I need a very long time with this other girl to wait for her to finally be ready to date. But I don't think I should tell her about my ex, because firstly, she probably hates on two-timing (even though we're not dating) and trust is very important to her. Telling her will ruin everything. And secondly, this decision should be mine to make alone. Am I wrong?

I should mention that the ex broke up because she couldn't handle dating, it was very stressful for her so she didn't want it back then.
I decided that the new girl isn't very compatible with me, and she has no chemistry with me. But my ex is both compatible and attracted to me, so I broke up with the new girl and hooked up with my ex.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think if you're just contemplating to yourself, it can be kept to yourself. If you're actual dating/spending time with the both of them, they do deserve to know the truth. While you might not technically be dating this new girl you said yourself she's the traditional type. I'm sure the reason she isn't jumping into a relationship with you is to see how genuine you are and how serious about her you are.

    If you have doubts that you can wait for this new girl that is something to consider. I STRONGLY agree with the other opinion. Exes are exes for a reason. Something happened and you just couldn't work it out. Personally when it's a situation like yours where you were the one rejected, I wouldn't give the ex the time of day over someone else. Like they can just have you now at your convenience... just rude.

    • I don't really think the ex is that bad or rude, I mean, she was pretty nervous about dating that's why she pushed me away. She couldn't handle it. But now she thinks she's ready to do it and she's properly fallen for me, so she's coming back.

      I'm not exactly just contemplating it. I'm spending time with the ex. The current girl is kinda busy right now (I'm not top priority), so we do some chatting a couple of times a week online. So I'm actually seeing both of them at the same time.

    • Then do what's right and make a choice. Or at the very least be an honest person and let things fall how they will when everyone involved makes their own decision.
      Be blunt with the girl, "I'm not a priority and I don't know where your head is at"... no use in beating around the bush or jumping through hoops forever.

      I never meant to sound as if I think poorly of the ex. I don't know the girl. What I do know is that in general exes are exes for a reason. You obviously know both of these girls better than anyone here and that is what you need to base your judgment and choices on.

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What Girls Said 1

  • No you're not wrong in term of it's your decision to make alone, and you shouldn't tell her about the ex why should you? I think you should go for the girl you are trying to get, and get rid of the ex because exes are exes for a reason.

    And if you don't like how traditional the new girl is, then leave it that way. You shouldn't limit yourself to only 2 options, cuz there are 7 billion people out there. More than half of that are girls :)

    • Thanks! I guess I shouldn't tell the girl about the ex then.

      ;) But those 2 girls are slightly better than the average girl out there, it seems. For one thing, they're really trustworthy and frugal.

    • For some reason I find it's kinda offensive lol.

    • errr. Lol. Obviously there are more traits. They're smart, playful, understanding. Their tastes and dress sense are close to a guy's, they don't care too much for gifts or appearances, etc.

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