Guys when talking to a girl on a dating site what do you expect when you meet?

So I met this amazing guy on a dating site, and while we've only had a few conversations we really click. One thing is though I'm 18 - still in high school, literally just starting out in life, and recently got out of a three and a half year relationship, so I've never really been on my own. I know I am ready to date again, that's not really the problem. I'm afraid I will seem green to him, he's 24, seems well put together, has a steady job. I know I'm really getting a head of myself here but I feel like he's going to want to meet me in person soon - I'm afraid the fantasy won't live up to the reality. How can I keep him interested after we meet without having sex right away? There's a six year age difference between us so is it really true guys like younger girls? I am actually really shy when it comes to talking in person so I'm terrified for what comes after, and that like I said he will see me as a kid compared to him.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I had a similar thing happen, similar ages. As a guy, I wasn't actually seeking sex from a young girl, but rather a relationship. I don't know your guy and he could be a player, but he could also have reached the stage in his life where he is looking for someone to maybe eventually settle down with (he sounds fairly responsible, and a responsible life can sometimes use a little bit of color that a woman brings). Sometimes it's harder to find people your age after college as well.

    I'd recommend practicing your poise. Every watch an Audrey Hepburn movie? She has some of the greatest poise as a lady; not rushing, thinking about what's said, and practicing good posture. I think if you act like a lady, your age won't matter as much. Also, he might be nervous as well.

    See what he's like when you meet. I'd recommend not having sex with him on this date.. you should be more reluctant especially since you are nervous about it. Take your time, don't rush things or be rushed into things. He will respect you more for it, despite your age difference, trust me. And, another reason to take it slow -- don't let guys use you for sex and then leave you. It'll mess with your head.

    • The last guy who tried to pressure me into sex lost two teeth... I don't think that will be much of a problem. Though I do think your right about him wanting a relationship rather than just a casual thing - it's usually pretty easy to tell the difference by the way they talk.

      I actually was raised to be a lady also was in a program to promote military awareness so posture is also easy - standing at attention for hours on end will do that to you, granted I'm a lady who isn't afraid to stand up for myself physically or otherwise but still a lady. Though the talking thing is harder for me - Never did much of it as I never really had to. Though I am glad to hear that older guys won't necessarily think of me as a kid. (: Thanks for the advice.

    • For talking with an older guy, an important thing is to allow him to direct the initial conversation (he's the guy and should lead). But, once he does so, add to this conversation with your own thoughts (don't be shy!). And sometimes, if things are getting awkwardly quiet and you like him, show him your interest by pushing the conversation forward yourself. This way, he doesn't feel like he's doing all the effort for making conversation.

      You sound nice, and like a woman with some self respect. Best of luck to you :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • It is best to just talk enough online to sort out whether they are stalkerish or not and meet ASAP. Both sides tend to fill in all the blanks with an ideal and get carried away. It is best to meet and get it out of the way before building too much of a fairy tale in the mind.

  • It really depends on the guy, but just do activities. I had this same experience once, the girl I met was 17 (told me she was 19, but that's a whole different issue) when i was 23, and was really nice, but kind of still a kid (into things like Christina Aguilera) so it was hard to talk about deep issues going on in the world etc. but overall it was still great, you can learn something from anyone and as long as you're kind and sweet, I'm sure he'll find some good things about you.

    Just do fun things with him to get a connection built so by the time he notices you might be immature for him, he already has so many things he likes about you and a connection established, that the bad doesn't weigh as heavily.

    Good Luck!

    • Well actually I'm more of a girl who loves talking current world events and stuff and Christina Agurilera drives me nuts... :P Thanks for the advice though

  • Absolutely Nothing is what I expect.


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