How to do you make him know early on that you're for commitment without directly stating that?

My friend set me up with a guy she knows. The guy she set me up with held my hand nearly the whole night. Good sign? When we were being dropped off his brother told him, "That's enough. Get her number now. I approve of her. I actually like this one and that means a lot." I guess from what my friend says his brother is very picky on who he thinks his brother should date. The guy asked to see me the night after we met. It's good for him to be asking to see you very soon, right? We arranged for two days after meeting him. The thing I've heard is that he's only committed to one girl. Though he's had benefits with other girls. I want commitment eventually. I need it clear early on that I'm not going to be a benefits kind of girl. How could you to get the message across without a blunt statement? Is there any reason, that girls might not know about, as to whether I should not be expecting commitment?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Just tell him. The guy's already holding your hand for Christ's sake. He's no player. Men tend to not hold hands with women they don't want to be serious with. Especially not through the whole night. If things start to heat up, that would be an opportune time to mention it. If he's the type of guy I think he is, he won't mind one bit. Obviously what his brother says carries weight, and your already preapproved. As long as there's chemistry between you two, I bet things will fall into place nicely.


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What Guys Said 2

  • To clearly convey to him that you are a commitment type of girl, you need to state it verbally and bluntly. Now, whence and where it should happen? I know not. But I would advice you to make your intentions known early, or as soon as you feel that you want to progress with him. Perhaps the on the third of fourth date or so. Otherwise, you risk being misunderstood.

  • "How could you to get the message across without a blunt statement?" You can't. To do so would be trying to manipulate a guy into some kind of relationship. Yes, love can sometimes be like playing poker, but sooner or later you're going to have to show your cards. If you have your convictions firmly in place, then sooner is better.


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