Boyfriend help should I talk to him or no?

My boyfriends 20 and im 18 lately we have been arguing a lot are last argument was because i took off a bracelet that he made me when he first asked me out. and then i looked through his phone and he hates when people go through his stuff even his family. I apologized for hurting him when i broke the bracelet and for going through his phone and promised not to do it again and asked if were still going to try and work things out because thats what we were in the middle of doing before those two things happened. He said he's willing to take things slow by the way we've been dating for 7months. Yesterday we went to the mall and i did a little shopping then i was like can we go to my house for a little and he was like no he didn't have a reason he just said no. Then his friends showed up at the mall and i got mad casue he hangs out with his friends everyday literally he goes out every night with them. and i thought it was just kinda rude for them to show up when we were having us time. Then we ended up going to hangout with his friends which i normally wouldn't mind if we hung out more but this was are first time hanging out by are selves in like a month. We went to the hookah lounge and after he asked if i wanted to go home and i said not really i still want to hangout with you more and then like 20 mins later he asked me again and i said i guess so and he was like are you sure and i was like yeah i guess so and he walked me to my car said by and gave me a kiss, and when we kissed i didn't even feel anything i just felt like it was a kiss i dont know if i should talk to him about how im feeling cause every time we talk we argue. not only that we haven't even texted all week the most he said was ill see you tomorrow gnight and that was the day before we went to the mall. when we first started talking we stopped because he wouldn't text me and i told him i like being talked to everyday. and i dont think thats to much to ask for.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You've put everything on the table, and from the gist of it I think it's about time you both moved on.


What Girls Said 1

  • If your question is should you talk to him, my answer would be yes. But I have other opinions about this relationship and you might not want to hear them... but just in case you do, here goes:

    This doesn't sound like the guy for you. He's making almost no effort to truly try and work on your relationship while you are. You also found some need to remove a keepsake that meant the one thing to him for you to have on and broke it, and also went through his phone which destroys some trust. So between the two of you, there is damage. You also said you always argue. The two of you just haven't learned how to communicate and instead of it helping, it's hurting. So for seven months, this is how it's been? You talk and it turns in to an argument and each night he passes you over to be with his friends leaving you to entertain yourself? How fair is that to you, and why does he even want a girlfriend? The two of you just have nothing in common to make this work. Even kissing him, you felt no spark. It's like a part of you two keeps dying every day.

    You two are hanging on to each other for likely one of a few reasons: You've become habit-forming and now fear being apart, you are focusing on investment of time (seven months) and feel that is owed some loyalty to stay together, or you really do love each other. Now, the reason I don't think it's love is because of all the things you mentioned in your question. Those aren't displays of love for each other. So you've now become either habit-forming or you are trying to hang on because you already spent seven months together.

    Ask yourself this: Can you do this for the rest of your life? If nothing improves and this is the way it is now, is this okay with you? If it is, yes, talk to him and let him know that you are interested in a life with ups and downs (mostly downs) and maybe considers couples counselling to try and pull some good to the forefront of this relationship.

    • (no room in answer)

      If you answer no, then yes, talk to him and tell him this has not been working and either needs improvements between both of you, or else you need to find happiness again on your own, as this has just been needlessly bringing you down. A boyfriend should be there to make you happy and be the person who is above all others, the one you both want to spend your time with and who make each other feel better. He is not doing this, and for some reason, you're not really thrilled with him either, so you are really missing out on a really good love. If not with him, then another guy down the road who is willing to show you this. Until that time, losing the deadweight of this relationship whether you stay together or not - meaning, things improve or you split, you deserve to be happy.