I mean, am I really wrong, here?

I'm 21. I work as a stock clerk, but obviously, I'm looking for a better job. I'm in school, I have over 60 credits, but I'm not quite sure of what the f***k I wanna do, so I'm just jumping into an English degree, and taking tests for city/ federal jobs to have under my belt. I'm also doing art on the side and planning to open a small company. I'm not a club guy. Now, I also still live at my parents' house. Not that I don't appreciate it, it's just, s**t, my age, you think I'd be a little further in life, y'know? Mostly my own fault. Anyway, yeah, friends keep going on and on about my dating life, and how I need a committed relationship, since all I've ever had were flings. Now, you know, I'm not picky, but I like the girl to be older, by about 2, 3, maybe 4 years. And not fat or crazy. But see, the stage of life I’m in, I’m a loser. These women have degrees, REAL JOBS, have their own place, some even have their own f***n' houses. And believe me, I WANTED a committed relationship. I wanted somebody I can grow with, share our lives. I could learn from and teach. So, I tried online dating, since I don't have much time to get out-out, and I noticed, y'know, these people wanna date a doctor. But honestly, I'm beginning to feel that relationships are based on getting what you want outta each other. Money, sex, status, etc. So, yeah, what I did was, I just started hooking dates up with more than one girl, some older, some younger. All of which I lied to either my age, level of education, my job, etc. I had to; being honest f****d me, in past relationships. I knew it won't last, but I figured if anything gets serious, I may as well enjoy the relationships I have while I have it. So, yeah, I set dates up with them. Then, a couple of days before I was supposed to meet up with the first one, I got into a horrible accident, that I'm lucky to be in one piece. Still in shock. But anyway, my friends, keep going on about how I need to date one, and that this is karma.

Karma for what? I didn’t want to lie. Like I said, I wanted to have a committed relationship. The reason why I want somebody older is because that’s what I feel I mesh with. But again, they all have degrees, real jobs, and where am I?
Okay, I’m working towards it, but everybody wants “here and now”. And it’s not like I’m not giving them anything in return. I don’t treat anybody like shit. Besides, everybody does it. Men, AND women.. Am I wrong for fudging the truth?


Most Helpful Girl

  • You date through online dating sites? Out of the people I've known that do online dating-only one person ever met someone that hadn't fudged majorly about themselves. That's out of five relatives and three friends. My Aunt even got stuck with a guy that proclaimed he was divorced. Turns out he was still married AND had three other women under his belt affiliated through the dating site she was with. If HE wasn't bad enough for her-she then met another guy on a different site that turned out to be a repeat criminal that was on probation when he met her. You know what he proclaimed himself to be? A lawyer!!! It's why I never agree to get into anything with guys off the internet that I've never known in real life. They just aren't real enough. Considering you haven't listed lying as badly as the two booboos my Aunt ran into-I would like to think it's not entirely wrong. It's not honest-but it's not THAT bad either. People should expect that from others as people are always saying everyone lies anyways. Just don't fudge to the point of no return.


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What Girls Said 2

  • you probably won't get a good job with an English degree. I suggest something with better job possibilities and more lucrative... its not uncommon to be 21 still at home with a deadend job, but its good you're trying to work on it now so you won't be in the same position at 25 or 30. right now you need to focus on building yourself, women will come later. you will lose money chasing women but you will never lose women chasing money

  • A good relationship cannot be built on lies.
    The right woman will love you for who you are, regardless of where you are at in life right now.

    • Yeah, I used to believe that, but things went to hell. All of a sudden, there doesn't feel like there's a right woman. Plus, nobody likes me for me. Who wants a retail worker who's unsure of his plans for the future?

    • You're only 21. Many people at that age are still uncertain of their future. You'll get your direction in life soon enough.

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