Guys, what should I think/how to approach this?

I started seeing this guy about a month ago. We've had five dates so far, chemistry, conversation, etc have been amazing.

He asks about things he knows that are going on in my life. He's made his interest in me clear. On our last date some friends wanted to meet up and he was completely game to meet them (didn't work out with timing).

I was pretty sure things were headed in a certain direction. He's even said that he sees potential for things to move forward and potentially wants it to if things continue. But he also admitted to still seeing other people. He's not wrong for this. I did get a little jealous but the night proceeded well. I mean, 5 dates. He very rationally pointed out that he likes me, a lot, but he's still trying to get to know me and it's still early days.

This hurt a little. I know we girls move a little faster but I'm jealous and feeling selfish. I want him to just want me. I want this to progress to something more exclusive. Perhaps not serious yet, no rush, but I do want to pursue something with this guy.

Also, he leaves things at my house. Some things aren't a big deal to leave (toothbrush, deodorant), some are (nice sunglasses, cologne). So why? If it was once, ok, but he's left something behind every time he's visited. Brings me flowers, too. Oh, and he had a wedding one night, and while we'd just started dating he wanted me to go with him (didn't work out, which was for the best). So what's the deal? Why lay it on so thick, and behave in a territorial manner (how I view leaving things), and then tell me he is still seeing other people casually? While I appreciate the honesty and I know he's not wrong this early in, it just feels like mixed signals.

Again. I know it's too early for us to become serious. I'm not suggesting we should be meeting each other's families. Just. How do I take this from casually seeing other people to, "I'd like to see where things would go, just us"


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What Guys Said 1

  • Be very careful, he may be stringing you along. Give him an ultimatum. Let him know since he's leaving things over and such that implies to you that he's ready for more. If he isn't, then he needs to stop leaving stuff over and keep it causal between you two. If he is ready for more, then you tell him it's time to stop dating others and focus only on you.

    • Thanks. Appreciate the insight. It's what my gut is leaning toward. Shame for him, though. He's playin games when he's got a fantastic girl in front of him that will easily walk away. Man. There are just too many options out there. While I think internet dating is great, I think it's also acting as a downfall. Why genuinely get to know one person when you can mildly know four? It's definitely a double edged sword. But I'm sure that's what is going on- I believe he genuinely likes me and is interested, but the allure of "what else could be out there" is too big (which also means he may not be the one). Thanks again!! :)

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