How to deal with overprotective parents?

really now... why? why not let your child go out even with her friends? go out without her sister! So Im 15 and my gf is 13.5 and she has overprotective parents. we have tried twice to meet but her parents wouldn't let her go out. we've thought of plenty things to say to her parents but nothing works. i told her to let me meet her parents but she said no because if they find out we will have to break up... we are 1 month together we were vacations on a village together (not same house ofc) but now on the city things are difficult. we only managed to meet for 5 minutes once just to buy some things. the secretive meeting... i dont know what to do. when we go to this kind of talk.. about our meetings she answers with short answers like "ok" "i dont know", like that and i dont know what to say to these...


Most Helpful Girl

  • my parents were SOOO protective up til first year university. i'm an only child with somewhat traditional chinese parents so i know overprotective.

    15 is a tough age, i've been through it. but honestly my dear, what i did was i earned their trust. i would always tell my mom where i am even if it's annoying, if i go home late i would let her know and basically she could always reach me if anything. even now i'm 21, if i go clubbing or out all night i would still let her know i won't be home that night or i'm crashing at someone else's.

    i know it's annoying but don't just brush her off and not reply, you'll never earn her trust that way. my parents went from completely overprotective (have to be home at 5PM) to basically mom telling me not to come home if i'm going to a club til next morning 'cause she knows she can reach me and i'm responsible enough to take care of myself


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What Girls Said 3

  • Dude, you're 15 and she's 13. Her parents could flip at that age difference. Yeah it doesn't seem like a lot to you guys... but when you're young it's a huge difference.

    It could really just be the age difference and to be honest, 13 is a little young to be dating. The fact that you're still using 13 and a half to describe her age shows a lot about how young up guys are.

    Can't you just wait or except it for what it is and move on? I know you want to date her, but at this age she needs to do what her parents say and you need to respect their decisions. If the parents never trust her, they'll never a prove of her going out. She needs to build their trust and respect. By the time she gets all of that they might let her date.

    They aren't being overprotective here, they're doing their jobs.

    Since that's not what you wanted to hear, have you tried being her tutor? You'll help her out in school and you get to talk to her. I Our Going to Have to actually help her out, but you stand a better chance that way.

    • her parents dont know about us. and i think you missunderstood me... i love her with more than my whole heart i would never do something to hurt her.. i know she is young and because of this i dont know what to say... if she was my age i would cope with her differently. i helped her many times with this problem but we cannot overcome it. when she builds trust with her parents something happens and *poof* there it goes... that something is her sister._. (my age)

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    • If you don't call it dating, you may be more likely to meet up with her. Or maybe you could even do a group study thing.

    • different school.. but still hard

  • i don't think they're being overprotective at all. she's 13. still a baby, and it's ridiculous to expect her to act like she's older.

    some parents, no matter what you do, will never be convinced you can take care of yourself. they are extremely adamant, extremely domineering, and will never let you have your say. in such a case, the best scenario is to do whatever you can to move out for good. it will be hard but it will be worth it.

  • There's not much you're going to be able to do at this point. She's 13 years old. She's very young. And while you're only 2 years apart, parents worry about boys period at this age, much less boys who are 2 years older. A sophomore and an 8th grader just doesn't sound too good. I'd say respect the boundary for now, I wasn't allowed to date until high school either.

    • my gf is really sad tho. i try to help her and she keeps these short answers.. i dont know what to say to her anymore.. i think im not good enough for her.. i dont make her happy...

What Guys Said 1

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