Do you think dating people on and off is really unhealthy?

I haven't myself but I knoq two people who have and personally I think it damages themself and other people they date. It also causes them to carry baggage for a long time. Here are two examples.

There was a girl that I met off POF a year ago who I had a lot in common with and was very attractive. She announced she was newly single but I was very naive about it and just played it by ear. Never dated a girl with baggage. For the first few months of talking, she mentioned nothing of the ex and seemed very interested in getting to know me. Once we started talking on the phone and I told her what high school I went to, she asked if I knew a guy who was her ex and complained about him how he's a piece of shit, controlling, abusive. She would bring him up here and there but never have a full conversation. She ended up coming on very strong to me and that caused me to fall for her because I really liked her. She quit talking to me a few weeks after we had our dates and started contacting the ex she said she wanted to avoid. I found out they've been dating on and off over the years and now they're dating again. It was also bullshit because a few weeks after she ditched me, she made a FB status complaining about how she can't find any nice guys with tattoo. I knew her ex from cross country and when I talked to him about her, she said if you're with her run, she's a psycho but now they're in a relationship again.

Another friend of mine from college dated this girl on and off but yet the'd always fight and argue when they were together.. He would always be dwelling on it after breakups and talking about it and even when he'd get with other girls, he'd still get very upset when he found out said ex was dating someone else. You would think he'd be happier with other people but because he's been on and off with her, it seems as if he'll never move on and constantly date this person on and off.

What are your thoughts?


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What Girls Said 1

  • I think dating people on and off is good but at the same time your hurting someone by running in and out of there life they will feel more lead on or used that way either way doing that is gonna cause way more drama in the end cause you have a lot of people mad feeling like they were nothing or hurt you need to stay in one and stick it out so you are prepared for life cause its the same thing like marriage if you can't get threw the ups and downs with a person they won't feel loved or cared about they will move on thats how divorces happen and break ups try finding someone you can actually see yourself dating for a while or long term thing try getting threw it all with that person and see how the outcome turns out if its bad you have saved yourself from hurting someone else just don't be with someone who is like your ex if it works out then you have made nothing but progress with that person to where you can make things work if you try and that person could be more open to doing the things you want from them or out of a relationship if you are there for them threw it all i don't see why a person wouldn't do something for someone who has been threw a lot with them

    • I think people that date on and off, from my experience, are constantly on the rebound when they're not dating the ex they're on and off with. They'll date other people to fill that void, while complaining about said ex, and once the ex comes back into the picture, they'll continue to date, get dumped, and the cycle continues. It's as if no one else will live up to the standards of the ex they date on and off. It's not fair to them and others they date.

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    • Well when I started talking to said girl in the question, she mentioned that she'd gotten out of a relationship and wanted to take it slow but did anything but once we met up and dated. Before we even met, she begged me to talk while I was out with friends and about to go to bed, talked about how mad she was that our date got pushed off because her parents wanted to stay longer while her and her family was on vacation. Asked to go to my house on the first date, asked for a 2nd date the day after. Even said stuff like let's talk, I love hearing your voice so it gave me mixed signals and because I liked her, that caused me to fall for her. So her going back to the ex was a huge slap in the face.

    • Exes will come back in the picture when they can't find anyone better then the person they had before or because there lonely i think its up to you on deciding weather or not if you want her in your life but i would move on because if she's dating on and off then she clearly doesn't know what she wants and there's no point in her leading you both on and end up hurting the other

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