How long do you wait for a guy to make it official?

I've been dating this guy for almost three months. We met online so we don't have any prior history to that. I'm 28 and he's 36. He has told me it takes him awhile to settle into something so I knew that from the beginning. Recently (around the 2ish month mark) I finally asked him that I needed to know how he felt about me because our schedules were about to be impossible for the next couple of months. Because of that I wanted to know that he was equally invested in this and that we were on the same page. He said he cared about me and was invested in seeing where it went and would definitely try to make it work if he can. But he said he's about half way there in terms of wanting a relationship. I'm wondering if this is an age thing. Like I know he's been burned in the past and as such gets into things much slower. He wants to be sure before there is true commitment. I did find out that we are definitely exclusive. (in every sense of the word) So he is essentially my boyfriend but doesn't want to give me the title yet. In fairness, even though we've been dating for almost three months, I only see him maybe two (3 on a great week) times a week. (Yes our work/life schedules are that crazy) So emotionally, he's probably only about a month and a half in. Anyway, I'm wondering if there are any guys out there with a similar personality that can give me some reassuring advice or if there are women out there that have any insight on this particular topic as well. My gut is telling me it is to soon to walk away and to just have patience, but I also don't want to be played as a fool. Any insight would be great!


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What Guys Said 1

  • Just keep on dating, keep on seeing eachother. Trust your gut feeling, patience pays. You say you two are exclusive so whats the problem? No label? Im no lady but if I were you I wouldn't worry about it, just keep doing what y'all do.


What Girls Said 1

  • Trust your gut feeling... I think you're right, it is too soon to call it quits.
    You know you guys are exclusive and he says he cares about you and wants to make it work... with that, titles aren't really THAT necessary, you know?
    It could be that he's afraid of getting burned, it could be that you guys don't get to see each other very often, it could be the age difference, and it could be a combination of all of these things... WITH the fact that there's really no reason to rush.
    You guys enjoy each other when you can, you're not seeing other people... I say enjoy it and don't worry about the title thing right now.

    I hope you guys continue making it work and making each other happy!