What should I think of her behaviour, it actually really pisses me off. help me out girls... is it me or is she just weird ( borderline case? )?

I've dated a 24 yo girl who has a 7 yo child, and things went fine that 1st month, spending a lot of time, intimacy etc.. talking about her daughter etc.. then she went on a holiday, back to family and friend sin poland, her daughter was there allready for a month, so we dated for a month without any interferance. that made things a bit easier, in the beginning she texted me a lot, sending me pics and she got more quiet after a while. so the day she got back , she texted me , that we can't be together, out of the blue and no reason. i think there are multiple factors influencing her, but every time i try to figure out whats going on she blocks me off. one moment she seems reluctant to talk to me, and 2 minutes later she tells me not to talk, or when we talk, she is holding back. ( I've talked to a doctor about me, and about her, and he, as well as some of my friends, think she has borderline ). the father of her child was 6 yo older when they hooked up, she was 14 he, 20, she got her child when she was 16, they stayed together for 9 years, he is since this year in prison for 5 years. she seemed to be really into me, but when we saw each other for the first time agian on our work, she acted cold. later she flirted with me once more, now she acts cold, sometimes she gives me a glance but in general, her attitude is like this. she loves to hate me, and hates to love me. I've done nothing wrong to her, and last time we had a small fall out, i had enough of these games, and told her, that i didn't deserve this treatment. later i posted a small message on my wall, on fb, but deleted it rather quickly. she did read it and informed me 1 day later, in the evening, rather late, that she did read it. i didn't answer, next day, she did send me an angry message no idea why, just out of nowhere, didn't respond to that either. i waited for 2 days, to try start a short convo, she answered fast. then next day, i did send her a small line, and now she completely blocked me. wtf..

we still see each other at work, but even there, she gives me a cold shoulder. she is nice to everyone, but me. sometimes competely looking the other direction and sometimes looking at me. its like she is trying her best to not like me,
because i really didn't do her anything wrong, I've always been nice to her and treated her with respect... i think it is borderline. im not demonizing her, but she never talks about things that bother her, everything is about her etc,,,,


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What Girls Said 1

  • Guys say girls date jerks but fail to see that they're hung up over "jerk" girls too. She sounds like she has no clue what she wants from you. Her hot/cold behavior indicates this. She probably likes the attention and thrill of knowing you like her. Another thing... she seems to enjoy playing with your emotions. My big question is why are you still hung up over a person like this? She has issues clearly and a very bad personality so to me it makes no sense why you are still trying to figure her out when it's obvious that she is just crazy and can't be that serious about her emotions to you. Her behavior is not normal for someone who supposedly likes you. She seems to just take advantage of your emotions which is NOT love but rather a ego thin for her. Stay away and move on.

    • i agree with you, but im someone who wants others to be honest with me. I think she used me as a boy toy for 1 month, and now she is back to her old life, as before I've met her. now her daughter is home and things changed. If i some up her behaviour, and her actions, i do really think she has borderline. these people hate themselves, and blame all the things that happened to them on themsselves, obvious her ex is a loser and an asshole, and now i come around, few months later, being nice to her, etc... conciderate bla bla bla, and she acts like this. I've plenty of other girls who flirt with me, and because she is hot, it doesn't mean she is a wonderfull person. if it the borderline ruining her life, im sorry for her, but i dont deserve this crap, its destroying me, its makes me agressive, violent and sad at the same time. she better moves back to poland, since she doesn't like germany anyway. she can throw her life away there, in that shithole!

    • Well even if she has Borderline Personality Disorder it doesn't give her a excuse. People like that are supposed to get professional help. The first thing I did when I was diagnosed with Bipolar II was get help and go on meds because I needed to take responsibility of my life. I think this is what any considerate person will do.

      If this bothers you so much then talk to her about it. I mean you can't do anything else. She's likely not going to be honest with you just out of her own... so you'll need to be the one who demands the truth and honesty. If she can't give that then you have to accept it cause you can't force anything.

    • I've tried that already, i asked her 1 day earlyin the morning at work, we need to talk now, she agreed. she got on with her work and i reminded her 10 minutes later. ok after this we talk, 3 minutes or so, dont need more time. then she said no, she walked away and i was like fuck it. 5 minutes later she comes down and told me, you wanted to talk to me, i said yes. i told her, lets go in here, no one can hear it. i asked her what her problem is, she said she had none, then i asked her, why are you being nice to everyone but me, she thought, looked shocked, like she didn't know what to say and told me she had to go. i really wanst buying it, then i waited after work, she ignored me, i told her we need to talk, she kept on walking and said no, i more or less feel sorry for her, but people with borderline dont realize they have a problem, this combined with her personilty makes its useless. i just can't stand the thought of others guys treating her badly, i shouldn't care, but i do

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