How can I be less shy and make him more comfortable?

I've been dating this guy for a little over a month. A mutual friend set us up and we really clicked. From what our friend has told me, this guy really likes me, thinks I'm too good for him, and is scared to even kiss me or hold my hand because he doesn't want to mess things up. I felt like we were going to finally kiss last night, but we both just kind of looked at each other and didn't go for it haha
We're both pretty shy when it comes to physically touch I guess so I don't really know what to do. I don't think I have the courage to just kiss him or hold his hand. How can I be less shy and make him feel more comfortable?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I feel like "get drunk" is probably not mature advice but it's advice that basically fixes all of your problems. Once you've gotten it out of the way you won't have to keep getting drunk to make out and you could get away with just a light tipple.

    If that doesn't seem like an option I'd just try and engender an environment where you can comfortably touch each other. If you do something like watching a film alone at home together you cut down the fear of other people seeing and you don't have to look at each other! You can then turn down the lights to put yourself even more at ease and then get a blanket out to cuddle up together under it. Throughout the film just make a point of slowly snuggling closer together - he's not going to reject even if you just start the night by licking his face so don't worry about putting your head on his shoulder. If you're comfortable then just try kissing his neck or cheek.

    If you're still feeling weird about it then just start tickling him until he gets the hint and pins you down.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like a lack of self-confidence on his part, or just humbleness. No one is too good from someone else and vise-versa.

    Make him feel like, a Man. Put him in take charge situations and see where that goes.

    Physical touch can be embarrassing to new-ish couples (you still have some time to grow after just one month). Conditioned couples will just find it natural.

    Basically, if the love and time is there, it will happen.


What Girls Said 1

  • You have to pretend you don't like him that much or care about the outcome - of course this isn't true, but if you pump yourself up too much about how much every interaction matters, you're just gonna come off flustered and in turn make him flustered. So just take a deep breath, act like you don't care what he thinks of you even just for a few minutes, and kiss him. At least then you'll have done it and gotten a reaction (which I'm sure will be a positive one).