Does my friend want more than friendship? Or am I just stuck in the friendzone?

This girl is a good friend and we're very close. We hang out and do things together all the time, and it's always just the 2 of us. People always think we're a couple, and our friends even think that something is going on between us. She's 30 and I'm 26, and when we first met a 1.5 years ago, I asked her out. She friend zoned me then and said, "you're too young for me, we should just be friends".

I never understood that because we would hang out as "friends" literally everyday...

Anyways, as of lately things have been changing. She calls me more and texts me more. She never used to randomly text me throughout the day, and now she does. Also, she works a lot and after work she calls me as soon as she gets out.

The other day she called me and I eventually asked her if we should watch our TV show. She said, "i don't know should we?" I didn't know if she was waiting for me to invite myself over, but we ended up not watching.

I texted her the next day saying i got tickets to a band we both like. She told me she already got tix, and when i asked who she's going with she said, " I don't know, i was going to ask you maybe". She pretty much bought them having me in mind. Later that day she texted me saying "i want to go shopping". She wasn't inviting me to go, but she just wanted to talk. I couldn't go with her, but i asked her if she wanted to get dinner and she said, "idk if my dad doesn't want to eat with me, do you want to go?"

She wasn't even dressed, and she said, "i'm not ready, you should just go without me, sorry :(".

Basically the past few days i"ve been asking her to do things and she says, "sorry I would have, but I can't" and has some excuse. The excuses are valid, like she told me that I should have asked her in advance, or given her a notice and she would have def gone.

A few weeks ago i spent 8 days at her house living with her when her family was on vacation. She was sick and asked me to take care of her.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think she likes you but is afraid. She may think because of your youth you're too young to commit and should be going out enjoying yourself.

    Make plans in advance, ask her out to dinner on Monday and speak to her then if you can, tell her you like her and would like to be in a relationship and see what she says. After getting to know you, she may think that you could settle down, but the fear might still be nagging at her if you don't speak up about liking her still.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • You're a friend. I have guy friends I'm very close to and who I reach out to all the time just to chat or when I have a problem or just to hang out and have a good time with. There's nothing romantic there.

    If a girl likes you, she won't pass up an opportunity to spend time with you. She would want to be around all the time.


What Guys Said 1

  • Be careful. Unless she's offering you sex, you're still basically "just a friend". One thing I have found is women will use the hell out of a nice guy because they're "Such a good friend" and they love the attention, but they have no true intent on ever letting it get beyond that.

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