Should "kids or no kids" be a dealbreaker?

I've been on a few dates with this girl. We get along pretty well, and I could see it going somewhere. We were talking about kids, and she admitted that she doesn't really like kids. And she said that she doesn't see herself having children in the future.

I said I respected that decision (and I do), and that it wasn't a dealbreaker. After all, it's only been about a month. But on my way home, I thought about it, and it does sorta bother me. I'd like to have kids someday, and that might be a marriage dealbreaker. She's mid-20s so I'm wondering if maybe she'll change her mind someday (she did indicate that she just doesn't see it) if things do get serious.

So what do you think? Is that something I should even consider this early? Or is it something we'd have to decide way in the future, if we even get that far?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would consider it. I don't want children. I informed my boyfriend of this fact. He is aware that my desire to mother a child is nonexistent. I think it's very important to know where your partner stands on the issue. Children are life changing and some people don't want their lives to be changed. You cannot expect your partner to sacrifice what they want in life for you to be happy when it comes to children. I would HATE my boyfriend if he forced me to have a child. It would absolutely ruin our relationship. Thankfully he also does not want children.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting kids and there's nothing wrong with not wanting them. Just make sure you partner with someone who wants the same thing. Otherwise one of you will end up miserable.


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What Girls Said 2

  • Honestly it depends on the person. Not everyone is a children person... and not everyone wants to have kids. Me personally I don't wanna date anyone with kids because I want to be the 1st to share it with my future husband. Also step parents aren't also a good idea, and don't always get along with the kids. I have a step mother and she is sooooo fake and is jealous of me and my dads relationship its annoying as hell but I ignore it because I love my dad sooooo much!

  • You shouldn't string her along if you don't think it'll work. My boyfriend wants kids and I don't. I want to get married, but my boyfriend doesn't. So, I constantly wonder why we're together. What's the point? I don't like kids at all. I don't see myself ever changing.


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