After how many dates is bringing up the subject of exclusivity appropriate?

I met Mr. X online and we've been talking for almost 2 months. We've been on 2 dates so far and they were each extravagant (not the typical coffee for first date and dinner for next). We talk everyday and the interest is there. Now, we're going to the States for the day to shop on the weekend and I think doing something like that for the day is something on another level. When do you think it's the right time for me to ask if he's seeing someone else? Or even when should I be expecting him to talk about being exclusive?


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What Guys Said 1

  • You want to quickly establish frank and open conversation so right now is a good time to ask whether he has other female interests current. You can tell him you would like an exclusive relationship with him, or you can tell him you are not ready for such a close pairing and then wait to see which direction this acquaintance takes. Don't worry, he won't disappear if he likes you, and he might appreciate you openness. Talk it through with him.

    • I definitely don't have a problem being open and he knows that. We're pretty open overall but I haven't done this online dating thing before and I'm worried I might be asking to be exclusive too soon. I do like him a lot and I'm certain that I want a relationship with him but I don't know if we're on the same page on that for now.

    • Well, you've talked for two months. He has invested in you with those two extravagant dates and now has invited you on a trip to spend more time with you. As you guys are together each of you will lose a bit of reserve and open up a bit. Don't worry about doing or saying something inappropriate. Keep the conversation light for now. Don't ask a bunch of direct questions, that will all come out. At this point, he's okay, you're okay.

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