I've had sex with a girl 4 times, in the last 5 days, we enjoyed it a lot sunday. It was unprotected and I found out she wasn't taking the pill after?

ok first time, bit unexpected, went to her place asking her to be honest with me, we were dating for a month, and she was playing the hot & cold game with me for past 6 weeks not talking to me for no reason. i decided to listen to my heart and just drop by at her place, asking her what her plan was, i told her i know you like me. so she got close to me, started kissing and ended up having sex. the day after we had sex twice, Tuesday no sex, she told me she was tired and her ovary & pelvis were hurting a bit. well didn't think to much of it, Wednesday we had sex again ( all 4 times unprotected ) . She enjoyed it, told me i was very good at it and wants to keep having sex with me. She even talked about kids, she already has a child, and there were she always was against having another kid, nw she seemed a bit more open about it. Yestersay i wanted to take a break, she called me anyway, i went to her place, she was crying. she told me she wanted to go back to poland but it seems so out of place, her daughter would came back from a 2 week break from poland, she had tons of fun with me, even yesterday telling me she likes having me around, i did notice she was a bit warm, i really dont know why she was crying. but the more i start to concider things, i dont think the sex hurted her, or else she wouldn't have sex with me again, i dont know when her period is, but well the ovary & pelvis pain could mean she was ovulating. A lot of women do experience discomfort or pain when ovulating, normally the ovulation is around day 14, concidering the fact she and i had sex before, around and after day 14, her crying, makes me wonder... well if , i dont mind becoming a father but i dont want her to think she made mistake, so what do you think, pls be respectfull and sincere, by the way she felt warm yesterday, sat on the sofa, eating nutella , listening to music, not willing to tell me whats wrong and later saying she is homesick, and 20 minutes later saying:i like having you around

thanks for the help ladies... sarcasm XD come give me your vision, pelvis & ovary pain caused by sex? or by ovulating, iif sex is the course of the pain you won't have sex right...


Most Helpful Girl

  • My opinion probably won't be your favorite but I think at your age you should be old enough to know that unprotected sex isn't smart. You took a chance with somebody that "maybe likes you" and could end up being a father. I do think it's honorable of you to step up to your responsibilities if you do become one but you ain't there yet and if you knew what having a child would entail you probably would have thought about protecting yourself. I'm honestly not trying to hurt your feelings here. If anything I want to shake your head. You've talked about you and her but what about the child if it comes to that? If you was this child which would you prefer? To see dad off and on (rarely if she moves too far away) or have parents together that love each other? Yes, it's still a 50/50 chance of parents staying together even if they love each other but it's a what chance here? It's a high child support check, visitation and you learning that another man can and will come in the picture. So in the end (if you two don't remain together) the child ends up with mom, dad (hopefully if she lets you be there), her boyfriend/husband and your girlfriend/wife. There's a lot to being a "real" dad and writing a check (which you'll find will drain your account) isn't all there is to it. I'm sorry if I'm sounding mean. If you do become a dad I wish you the best but IF you don't, please think about things first next time. The best question to ask yourself is: if you were a child growing up what would be your ideal life?


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What Girls Said 2

  • If you are that concerned about the possibility of pregnancy, why not ask her to do a test; especially in light of the pelvis pain.
    To be honest, i think that she may already be pregnant but it may not be yours. I think that while she was"hot and cold with you" she was having sex with someone else and it probably didn't work out. Then you came by and all feeling the way you do about her, and she decided to have sex with you (whether for comfort or because of vulnerability or need for a way out) I could be wrong, and i hope that i am, but for your sake, talk to her and have a test done.
    She seems to be really confused right now too, hence the suggestion to return to Poland; so be gentle
    All the best

    • im not concerned, well i dont know, she says she has a relationship with someone, in July she was dating me, in August she went on a holiday back to family and friends in Poland. during those 2 weeks, she established a relantionship hmm doesn't sound very natural. in July she was always taking the pill, i saw her doing so. but she doesn't really seem to like the guy, and during our time dating, she didn't have sex with me once. what makes you think she is already pregnant, that would mean she would be 1,5 month pregnant , wouldn't i notice it somehow. I've read that women do feel pain when they ovulate, some do, some dont.. it was exactly on the 14th she told me so. she always told me she doesn't want another child, i can't imagine she is pregnant, why even risk having sex with me then when you are pregnant if it wouldn't be me, so what makes you think she is pregnant, i dont see any signs, and she seemed very loyal to her long distance relationship, untill our fling Sunday

    • Show All
    • You would notice that i mention that i seems so to me... so far, you are making assumptions regarding ovulating etc. As I've said, talk to her and do a test. Yes every woman's body is different but i can tell you that her entire disposition is suspect.

    • Her entire disposition is suspect , how do you mean? wouldn't i notice it, if she would be pregnant, you would eat more ( i can vouch that she actually doesn't eat enough, especially if she would be pregnant ) , she always talked about not having another kid, i saw her taking the pill, and all of a sudden has unsafe sex with me, and isn't taking the pill any longer... i see no physical changes in her, and womans breasts hurt when they are pregnant,, yet again she doesn't make a sound if i touched her breasts. i would like to know why you think she is, sorry if i sound upset, but i can't find any reason for her to be so, she always seemed well aware that if she would have sex she would get pregnant , if not taking the pill... she is in a complicated situation, her daughter likes the guy she has a relantionship with, but from i dont get the feeling she is deeply in love with him..

  • If you love her, she's in a good spot if she's carrying your baby. Own up to that & be there for her. :)

    • well if it would end up her being pregnant, i would be there for her, im not that type of guy, there s no greater shame for a guy to walk away from his own family. i would love the idea of having a child from her, she means the world to me

What Guys Said 4

  • "i decided to... just drop by at her place, ... i told her i know you like me... ended up having sex"

    nice work - that's pretty baller.

    primarily, i'm kind of concerned she was so ready to have several sessions of unprotected sex without telling you she wasn't on birth control. because i don't think that's an honest or responsible thing to do.

    • you guys only think about the sex part do you... i love this girl, she means the world to me, i really didn't go there with the expectation of having sex, sorry but im not the type of guy who wants to earn other peoples their praise for getting sex. i like your comment, but i went to her place to get an answer, well i already knew she still likes me, so i just did the most manly thing i could come up with and confront her with her actions... well i thought she still was on the pill, since during July when we were dating, she showed me she was , and we didn't have sex. 6 weeks things go sour , and now we have sex and have contact again... i thought she was still taking the pill, well i dont mind becoming a father , im not angry but if she won't be on her period this month or next month it could just mean one thing... then ill need 2 jobs.. time will tell, i dont know what her motivation is next to enjoying the sex,

    • perhaps i was a bit flippant. what i mean is that it's a pretty confident and fearless thing to do. that and your commitment is respectable.

      my main point was to validate something you were already thinking- that there's at least a small chance it might not be on the level.

      you have my best wishes.

    • thx, sometimes its just better to confront someone. i did pick the wrong setting several times, so i was pretty stupid as well now and then. Im happy i did what i did, she is a damaged girl, but she has a very caring and sweet personality. Im a great guy, but i fell like i had to step up a bit, and be a respectful men. i wouldn't mind her getting pregnant of me, i know its ignorant from me to say so, because i think we both didn't give it a thought or maybe she did, for not taking the pill... she only took a shower once afterwards but that doesn't make any difference, i accidently came on her outside, not completely but ok , thats a reason for taking a shower i guess.. i wouldn't like it myself either.

  • what's your question?

    • my questions is about her behaviour, telling me she has little discomfort around ovary and pelvis, I've read it means woman are ovulating.

    • it could mean she is ovulating

  • i58.photobucket.com/.../...eaction_zpsecc4e2b7.gif

    Is it too earlY to say

    • yeah i know but well if she ain't having her period this month or next month that would be a forecast...

  • Hehe you're new dad;)))

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