Is it my own trust issues, or has he given me a reason to doubt him?

I'm at my wit's end and I'm starting to have that familiar feeling of anxiety pop up like I have in the past with men I've dated. I'm torn between feeling like it's my own trust issues and feeling like he's given me reasons to not trust him. I've had a past filled with an abusive single mom and an abusive ex, therefore, I am always looking for ways that people can lie to me. It's like I refuse to get emotionally attached and hurt again, so I protect myself by being on high alert. This guy sparked my BS meter when he said he was in my college town when his Tinder said he was 44 miles away. I confronted him and he blew up my phone, saying it was the way he worded it. I finally believed him because he has Aspergers and they cannot convey words nonverbally very well. Then, he told me he didn't know of any clubs in Atlanta, or had been to any, only for me to find on his Instagram that he had been to a rave at a club this past weekend in Atlanta. I confront him and he says that it wasn't a club, offering an excuse that he was forced to go, etc. I didn't buy it, but let it rock on. Then, last night, he tells me that he only has $4 to eat on, but stalls when I mention places (on our first face-to-face meet). I finally get him to agree to mexican food and all he orders is a cheese quesadilla. He then has to use his debit card because he didn't have enough cash. But he only had "$4" remember? I get pissed about this and even more pissed when I look online, snooping because he has already lied to me, and see that he has boasted about getting $28 of gas that filled his car up right after we said our goodbyes last night. I go so pissed that I couldn't contain myself. It is not about the money, but the unnecessary lying. It really hurts me. I confronted him after giving him a chance to tell me when I asked if he had made it home on the $4.50 and he lied again. He told me his mom gave him money last minute and he didn't tell me about it because "I scare him." I'm so conflicted. :(


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  • If he feels the need to lie to you hun, he isn't for you.. From reading all of the above twice, I don't think its your trust issues.. If anything from your past, your more aware of your surroundings and people you let into your life..
    If he had money or not, it doesn't matter..
    But if he turns and tells you one thing but it turns out to be another, that's lying to you plain and simple... If when you confront him he's making excuses, and Making you believe him.. Then that's not a relationship you be in...
    You should reconsider yer relationship, just mainly for yourself.. By the sounds of things you've been threw enough, there's plenty of men out there that will treat you like a princess..
    Don't settle for someone who's lying to you and making excuses.

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