Am I expected to make her have an orgasm?

I am having sex for the first time with my girlfriend this weekend. We're both virgins and I'm really nervous. The only (sexual) thing we've done together is masturbate side my side (no bjs or anything). She masturbates and she knows what it's like to have an orgasm, so am i expected to give her one? Of course I want to, and I'm going to try, but I've never eaten a girl out before and I'm not sure how effective it will be. I also know that sex will be painful for her so should I try and make her sum before the sex?

I just want her to really enjoy it and I'm incredibly nervous about the whole thing. We're both 18 btw.

  • Yes, you have to
    Vote A
  • You don't have to but it will be better if you did
    Vote B
  • No just focus on being in the moment
    Vote C
  • See answers
    Vote D
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Before having sex you should probably give each other oral first and make each Other cum. Especially you because during your first time guys usually cum like right away and if you cum before hand you will last longer and just try your hardest to make her cum. I know it's both your first time but all your attention should be on her. But since it is your first you most likely won't make her cum when actually having sex because again, it's only your first time. And that's totally okay. As long as you try you'll be fine. And yes it will be painful for her. There's not much you can do to stop the pain but you can lessen it. When inserting your self into her, make sure you take your time. When your fully inside just stay still for a minute or two and let her adjust. Ask her when she's ready and when she is, carefully start thrusting slowly into her. Depending on how painful it is for her you can go faster after a few minutes. Make sure you also keep asking her if she's okay, if she needs you to slow down or stop, and also to keep her mind off the pain you can kiss her. It will keep her mind off of how painful it is. And by the way she will probably be in pain after wards as well and if she is just lay with her and hold her in your arms. She'll feel a lot better. Anyway, good luck and I hope it goes well for you two (:

    • by the way make sure she is wet too before you insert your self into her so it won't be very difficult to put your penis in and it will also lessen her pain

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • if you've newer had sex or done anything other than suede by side.. why are you jumping straight to sex?

    you should take your time spend a few months getting used to each others bries learning what you like opening her up so sex isn't so painful the first time.

    why are you guys jumping to sex. why not get used to everything that goes with it. there's a lot of sexual activity can be done, without having to jump straight to impaling her ;p

    wheres the fire whats the rush. gain some experience and build trust first. itll feel better when you get to it. thats my advice:)

    • oh and next to no possibility shell come from vaginal penetration first time. ashes going to be in a lot of pas in. you want toy focus on being gentler not making her cum. thats why you guys really ought to explore a lot of other avenues for equal satisfaction. not just to ensure orgasm but to help lessen the pain. she's never even been fingered. her hymen may still be in tact that just makes sex so much more cumbersome than just having to stretch things.

      take a few months and loosen things up a bit get comfortable sexually then when it feels right do it.

      saying i plan to have sex this weekend doesn't feel right. you'd only know it felt right if it was already the weekend and it felt right. you're putting unnecessary pressure on yourselves and putting her through unnecessary pain... i just dont see why.

  • First just make out, touch each other, you know foreplay. For the experience to be a bit easier for her, she has to be wet…so you have to get her to that point before penetrating. It would be easier for you to slide in.

  • It's your first time, do what feels natural.


What Guys Said 1

  • I think you should give each other oral first and achieve orgasms that way before engaging in sex. This way you always have a fall back plan so when you fail to give her an orgasm through penetration, as you almost certainly will your first dozen times, she's still going to get sexual gratification.