Is it cheating if the relationship is open?

If the couple agreed to an open relationship in the beginning but neither have acted on the openness of it for 2 years, is it cheating if one party sleeps with someone else? They've been monogamous for the 2 years they've dated.

My roommate (female) is in an open relationship in the situation described. She went out on Halloween and came back this morning and was talking about having slept with another guy (s). It's unclear how many guys she was intimate with last night.

The rest of us (3 other roommates) are wondering how her boyfriend is going to handle the news. He wasn't in favor of the open relationship in the beginning but agreed to it to be with her.

The relationship is open, but is it really?

How do you think he'll react?

Well so far he appears to be handling it fairly well. He stopped coming over to the apartment for a while but he's around now. They're basically attached at the hip. I doubt he'll be letting her go out to parties alone again any time soon. We'll see if he's okay still a few weeks from now. I'd be halfway to Texas if I were him, but we'll see.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Devastated. If she hadn't used the openness for 2 years and has been entirely dedicated to her 1 partner, and than sleeps with another guy... she either wants to screw up, does not want a relationship or is naive.

    • Thanks for the most helpful... if only it were a happy story but, that's life :-(

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What Guys Said 1

  • Nope, not if there is no stated commitment, sleep around as you like.

    If he cares for her or loves her he will be crushed and depressed. Or he may be jealous and try to win her back. He may take it like so what? Too many if's. Just don't know?

    For me, I'd be devastated. I would have thought everything was fine between us and then the bombshell hits. Just have to see. Report back with the results.


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