Is he just freaking out? should I just walk away? will us being friends end in disaster? Any advice would be great!?

So i dated this guy near 10 months

It was fantastic we never argued, we met each others familys, friends, dated.

2 weeks ago he ended it. He said he wasn't ready for a full on relationship. We didn't get to speak about it properly and a few days later we ended up on the same night out and had a big fight. i was ready to never talk to him again until his best friend seen me and came up to me saying that X (we will call him that) Loves me and hadn't spoke about another girl the way he speaks about me. Just his head has been so messed up since his last ex.

So Sunday morning i was lying in bed thinking about him he text me early asking me to come over and talk about things.

So i went over we talked, I cried, he cried (which was really unusual ) telling me how much i meant to him and i was one of the few woman he did trust in his life. He said he just wasn't ready for a relationship and keeps thinking he will drive me out his life and i will hate him. after a lot of back and forth i told him i loved him and that i understood and to my surprise he told me he loved me to. we spent one last night together as "us"

he is keen to keep us as friends but i said i needed a few days to think about it.
So i decided to try and be friends and went to his gig the following week. A few of us went back to his flat and he kept doing things like puttin his arm on my back and at one point pulled me in for a hug and kissed my head. So the inevitable ended up happening.

We talked about it in the morning and he told me he loved me first and i was shocked. he started to cry saying if i thought us being friends was to hard and i needed to walk away understand. i asked why he was crying he said he didn't want me to completely walk out his life and that this was a hard.

we ended up arguing about it a few days later because he felt guilty. Then he was pointlessly texting me yesterday. I dont know if i should not hold my breathe and walk because of how i feel about him. i

He's been texting me a lot this week and on the weekend there text me after i came out a club.
To be clear it wasn't a booty text he wasn't in the city so there was no chance of a hook up.
we text til late hours in the morning just talking rubbish and he complimented a photo of mine.

i don't know what to do a love the contact but think it's probably bad in the long run of things if he wants us to be "just friends"

Any advice?


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  • He is Obviously in love with you, sweetie... his every word and action is Speaking volumes to me here. However, with this Heart comes hurt and confusion on his end because he doesn't want to give up his Life and be in a Real relationship right now, which is making this harder than he thought.
    you both have told one another what you feel for each other , where you stand and where you Want to stand. And with every fight, comes tears and fears that you may end up losing a special friendship that you have nursed and nurtured and do not want to ever lose because of something that doesn't have to go down a beaten path.
    There is too much Drama Queen Dramatics here, too much over thinking. And with also too much "He said, she said," this will always be a War of the Roses if it keeps on going down this rough road of Him "Not wanting a romance right now."
    Go slow with his flow. He has told you he loves you and doesn't want to be hooked at the hip right now. Stay friends, go lite and semi sweet, be natural, let things go easy so you both can Find out where this is heading for.
    You have come this far, why walk away now? If you really love him, bear with him, for He too, you are forgetting, has his own cross to bear whenever he is with you. He has a heart and he beats just like yours You are both not made of steel, you both bleed and with time, if it is meant for old Mother Nature to sow more seeds down a romance row, she will and reap them ripe and well.
    Rome wasn't built in a day and neither was romance. It's your call, your choice, but something is telling me you would just end up coming back to him And--------I cried, he cried.
    Good luck. xx

    • He has texted me everyday this week and i don't really know how to approach us being friends. i've kept the chat light hearted but i'm taken back a bit as he ended it.

      I do want him in my life but i have this overwhelming fear he will move on and i won't. I had said this to him and he said he wasn't just going to move on from me and possibly it could go in the other direction where i move on and he doesn't..

      I know he is hurting to. Thats what i don't want. i feel like my head is just turned to mush lol!
      I respect how he feels and dont want to push on the matter or drive him away. But i keep questioning wether i'm strong enough to just be his friend.

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    • i really think you are spot on.

      i just need to take things one day at a time xx

    • Thank you, sweetie... yes, okay, agreed. xxxoo