What exactly is a friends with benefits and what are the limits and ground rules?

I basically know what it is, but can I get some advice about this kind of thing? Like what are the limits and ground rules? Because I am thinking of asking a friend is this is suite to our friendship because of the following signs:

He hugs me a lot and kisses me on the forehead
He used to grope me a bit last year but had to stop because he was afraid it ruin our friendship

What do you guys think? Advice is needed.


Most Helpful Guy

  • The rules are whatever you want them to be. Based on my own experience, I would urge you to be open, honest and flexible.
    I once had friends-with-benefits arrangements with two women (at different times). It was at their suggestion. At the outset, both were adamant that it was sex, nothing more. At the first sign of romantic attachment by me the arrangement would be terminated. Their rules. I took them at their word. What else could I have done?
    After a while I wanted more with and from both of them, but I kept my mouth shut because of the rules that they had set. Still later, the arrangements faltered because the females began to muck me around.
    Years later, when I bumped into both of these women, they told me that they had wanted more (boyfriend/girlfriend with a view to marriage) and were disappointed that I had not pursued more, which was why the arrangements ended. In each case, they ended the arrangement because they hoped it would spur me to do/ask for more.
    At this point I realised that women have an expectation that men should have psychic powers and also understand the mind games that women play. We are not psychic, nor are we equipped to understand female mind games. Men are simply not wired that way.
    I was very, very interested in both of these women and could easily have married either of them.
    Therefore, I say to you ShyScorpio, do not expect this man to be clairvoyant. If you want more, tell him.
    We men are simple creatures. Do not expect us to "just know". If you want us to know something, the only sure way is to tell us.


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What Guys Said 2

  • A friend with benefits is a friend you also have sex with.

    How and when it works is down to the two of you. You need to discuss your arrangements. For example:
    What do you do if one of you starts dating someone? Do the benefits (sex) stop?
    Are you allowed to kiss? Cuddle? Or is it all about sex?
    Are booty calls allowed?

  • There's no specific rules really, he two who are friends with benefits are the ones who set the rules and it can be anything they want. It's a two way streak, they both have to agree to whatever terms or lines are set.


What Girls Said 1

  • friends with benefits is friends that sleep together u dont date so ur single n free to see other guys but while ur not in a relationship u get ur midnight booty call lol