Dating your bestfriend?

My best friend and I started dating last month, he lives in Vancouver so we are starting off with a long distance relationship, I've known him for 5 years so I got to know him really well, but the last year was when we started taking our relationship to the next level, flirting etc. having a long distance relationship makes this transition from friends to couple pretty hard, I always question if he actually loves me or just loves me as a friend, I know it's silly but it's always on the back of my mind, why would he choose to be with me now after all these years? I constantly question if he really loves me the way I want to be loved or if it was just convenient for him. He makes sure to text me every morning and call every night he tells me I'm the love of his life, but it's only been a month how could he possibly already know that? We haven't even had sex, I need help! How do I know it's really want he wants?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think he told you exactly what he wants already. It's not unlikely that he loves you over the past 5 years he has seen and witnessed all that is great about you from your personality to a possibly caring nature. Men do notice things unlike what is normally portrayed about them. It's also quite normal for you to feel this way all new relationships are hard and if you add in the long distance it's even more difficult. I'm guessing you never saw him as more than a friend until he started flirting with you? You mention sex is that something you want with him or were you just mentioning a fact?

    • I was just stating a fact that we haven't even been physical yet and he already considers me the love of his life. I finally get to see him in two weeks for the holidays but I'm still on and off about the whole thing, are guys really simple creatures and I should believe everything he says about how he feels?

    • Show All
    • @zoro8888 amen. Like "I don't love u" but I do I just don't trust u right now lol

    • Thanks for MH! Hope it's still going well for you guys :)

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What Guys Said 1

  • 1 u dont need to have sex to know you love eachother
    2 maybe he has always liked you and he is just head over heels that you and him are dating and is truly in love with you

    • I can honestly say I feel like I pursued him more in the past and there was just no progression, and all of a sudden this year he decides I'm the one he wants to be with? I've been in his life long enough to know his current situation with past girlfriends, maybe I'm insecure but what makes his feelings for me anymore real. When I ask about the other girls he said he wasn't comfortable around them like he is with me and that we can have 2 hour conversations no problem but has a hard time talking with other girls, to me this wasn't the answer I wanted to hear, I'm a bit of a romantic I want Prince Charming not mr. Settling for second best

    • Well prince charming could be him and you dont know it yet its been a month not 10 years in a month if you dont like it still break up with him but try to keep your friendship things will all work themselves out

What Girls Said 1

  • It probably took him a long time to get the strength and courage to start flirting with you. It's a pretty huge step. If you're friends with someone and then develop feelings it gets super difficult because you don't know when you need to speak up and if it's worth losing a friendship over because in a lot of cases friendships end when one best friend ask the other out. He was likely just scared of that happening.

    As for whether he could already love you... my boyfriend is the exact same and tells me he loves me all the time despite us not being together that long. I honestly just think it's more "lust" and sometimes the words "I like you" just doesn't cut it so then the word love seems appropriate. I think real love takes longer to develop but it's definitely possible to be strongly in love with someone after such a short period of time and then it's just natural to already want to say things like you're the love of his life.