Guys: why do you fuck the hot girls but date the so so girls?

I noticed the really attractive girls who get a lot of attention only get guys looking for sex and the ones who almost never get much attention from guys have more relationships.

this is no matter how sweet or bitchy either type actually is.

  • I don't like competition.
    Vote A
  • the hotter girls intimidate me. I won't even bother to approach them at all.
    Vote B
  • I trust the less attractive girls more. explain why below.
    Vote C
  • I do try to have real relationships with hotter girls. they always reject me.
    Vote D
  • other. explain below.
    Vote E
Select a gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

this is regardless of personality. I've know the nicest, down to earth, easy-going, beautiful girls who get a lot of unwanted sexual attention but guys almost never ask them on dates. or they ask them on a date hoping it ends in sex. the guys rarely ask them to be serious.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it comes down to stereotypes. Social culture tends to depict "hot chicks" as bitches, insecure, or drama queens. And when it comes to dating a first impression is pretty much everything, so if by beinf hot them make that negative association in a guys head, their first impression won't be a good one and the dude won't bother approaching unless it's for a fling.
    That being said, it's definitely not all guys... after all Megan Fox is married right;) lol


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 45

  • Most guys know from EXPERIENCE that hot girls are MOSTLY (and, yes, there are definitely exceptions) shallow and narcissistic because they've had everyone telling them that they were pretty forever, and so in their minds, they are "better" than other people. Also, because they can use their looks to get what they want, they tend to be very shallow, very focused on their looks (to the exclusion of other interests), and tend to be very high maintenance.

    If you're just trying to bang some girl, her personality doesn't make much difference - you won't be around long enough or often enough to really be bothered by it. If you want a girlfriend, though, personality is a MUCH bigger priority, because no matter what she looks like, eventually you stop seeing her physically and start "seeing" her as her personality. Girls who aren't super-hot (even if they are well above average) are less likely to be shallow and superficial, and more likely to have developed their brain and be an interesting person BEYOND their bodies, and that's what guys looking for a relationship care about.

    Hot girls constantly get hit on for sex because the guys that hit on them only want sex, and because they only want sex, they don't mind (what they assume to be) her less attractive personality. Of course, she'll also get the occasional "good guy" hitting on her too, but she'll probably dismiss him like she dismisses all the rest, assuming he also just wants sex (and if she's got a lousy personality, she's right).

  • i believe most guys do that, because they think that being with a less attractive girl, chances are less to cheat on them

  • Well, for starters I don't go out looking for sex in the first place, attractive or not. Not my thing.

    Two, I know I'm not that good looking, so I'm not going to try and swing above my weight. I want to give myself a fair chance. A super hot girl probably will want a guy who looks better more, and since she's so hot she probably has tons of options. That means as soon as she finds a comparable guy that happens to be better looking, you're out of the game. I'd rather try for an average looking girl who will worry less about looks since she isn't that super fly either, and who will pay more attention to personality. This isn't just a theory, it's something I've noticed in every day life.

    • it seems that you're the one obssessed with looks. you should also work on your insecurity issues.

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    • Nah, Asker, this is a solid post. Dude knows what he wants. Doesn't sound insecure.

    • Your DP is pretty good looking actually, don't be so harsh on yourself lol

  • Voted C) because what you find attractive is probably not what I find attractive. I am not interested in those who cake themselves in makeup, are skinnier than a twig and party every night drinking themselves to oblivion. Most "attractive" people do that. I am not interested.

    I am attracted to a specific body shape and certain facial bone structure elements, and more importantly I am interested in those who get less attention because of how they are quieter than the typical extroverted crowd.

    I will never be compatible with an extrovert. I just can't bother with all those inane activities, mostly involving drinking and screwing up your body and mind, surrounded by people in intoxicated state - the opposite of what I deem trustworthy.

    I guess people just aren't interested in the "attractive" girls with that kind of personality either.

  • It really depends on their attitudes and it's based on their day to day experiences with the hot girls and so-so girls. I know some hot girls who can keep a steady relationships but then you got some hot girls who spend every weekend on the bar and post cleavage pictures and butt photos all over their Facebook. I got one coworker who constantly complains about wanting a relationship and has 50+ "liked" photos of her showing herself off like crazy.

    It's really all about how the girl carries herself. I've seen some unattractive girls who can't get dates either and guys are still only interested in hooking up. There are guys who only want to date a hot girl and don't feel like a girl is worth dating but he'll hook up with her since in his mind he will be with a hotter girl later.

    Another big point to mention is that there are girls who I find attractive and think are an "8" yet my friends will consider a 6. So to me they're super hot but to a frienda mine they may be "meh."

  • I think it depends on the girl. I am dating a super hot girl and she is putting off this vibe that totally makes me not think of her as girlfriend material. Like I do fun date things like take her ice skating, take the cable car, etc. I will take and hold her hand and kiss her goodnight. She is "always" busy and puts this tough defensive vibe up.

    Alternatively, I am dating another girl, I guess you could call her so-so. But she clearly wants to be with me and is interested in me. Honestly, I'd rather do the fun stuff with her because I know she's having a good time and enjoying my company.

    • hot girls are spoiled and often damaged... they use men who want sex to get a lifestyle out of them and they always have alternative options so they can seem one feet in one feet out. they aren't the greatest if you want something secure and long term... they got issues... dont even get me started on meeting htem in your 30s... lots of undatable hotties. write offs i tell ya

    • It's like she isn't "there". But I see she is there and all that. I don't know...

    • @Dillion I understand 100% where you're coming from; someone can physically be there in your presence, but not be emotionally/mentally engaged.

  • Because hot girls will get more than one boyfriend if they feel like they can get better ones.

    They will always be in a relationship but just to keep the guy around until they find a better guy who does more things for them (generally friendlier and other stuff)

    If a guy comes off kinda weird.
    Then"I have a boyfriend."
    but if they're cool they can give them a chance no big deal!

    I see it allllllllllllllll the tiiiiime. :))

    Try to be a good boyfriend/ interesting guy and girls you thought you will never be with. You have a chance.
    Everyone does just don't be so hard on yourself.

    • And If I like a girl she won't be so-so to me. Girl always get prettier once you date them. They just have to find their looks.

    • So-so girl can hold a man down harder by the way.

  • I don't know I never really think about it like that I guess I can understand the competitive aspect to it but that wouldn't effect my decision to date a girl or not. I think good looking people are treated differently from childhood and tend to develop differently than those that are not so good looking. The girls I've spent time with have never been perfect genetics/aesthetics but definitely attractive and I think that if the relationship has any real bond or is meant to be then there is no reason to be afraid of them attracting other people since the interest and bond is based on more than mutual attraction I want to have similar interests and personality with a girl and well as be sexually attracted to her. If the conpatble personality and interests are not there then I just want to bang her

    • Maybe I have a handicap most men don't have... I can't fuck a girl I don't genuinely like. :-P

  • I think most guys will vote E.

    You forgot a MAJOR reason in your poll... "the hotter girls aren't as good with relationships than more average looking girls".

    This is a statement that MANY of my male friends swear by.

    • For me personally, it's simpler than that for me.

      From my personal experience, I find the higher-tier attractive girls, on average, as being less interesting (as in hobbies, interests, and personality quirks).

      I went to a school on the beach in southern California for college (UCSB; go Gauchos!)... and I can personally tell you, that a lot of these "top tier" girls, are vapid shells with minimal substance.

  • I have never successfully dated a woman who u would consider a knockout. I'm a good looking guy but not a supermodel. So what i'm saying is what I believe it to be but not based on experience. I think men are afraid that if they have a really hot girlfriend, the girl is going to leave them for a better looking guy because she can have whoever she wants in his mind. Having a so so girlfriend makes it less likely she will leave him and allow him to have more control over the situation. I know it sounds ridiculous but i'm pretty sure that's what the thought process is.

  • In MY case it's not like that. When I just want sex I'll go for the hottest one, regardless of personality, but when I want a relationship, I focus on her as a person, so if I like a girls personality, and she happens to be a so so, then I will still date her, but if she's hot, I'll date her too.
    I will date any girl that I find attractive both physically and in personality, but personality is more important, I don't care if she's a 7 or a 10, if I like her personality, I wanna be with her.

  • Most hot chicks are indeed bitches. They get by on their looks, and everyone tells them they're pretty. So they grow arrogant over time. However, I find them to have few redeeming qualities. They're not all that intelligent, and they talk a lot about useless banter like TV shows, make up, celebrity gossip. Once they start to age, life goes downhill quickly for them.

    Average girls are more humble and emotionally stable. They feel more like human beings, and less like TV drama queens.

  • There's nothing inherently wrong with hot girls, but the reality is that most really hot girls tend to develop very narcissistic traits. They have so many people up their butts all the time that it's hard for them not to believe they are one of God's elect. I knew girls I grew up with who were singled out for their beauty from the age of 12. That can't be good for the development of a balanced ego.

    The really hot girls at my university all seem to know that they are hotter and "better" than all the guys there. It's a small school, and they tend to date guys outside the school because the rest of us are just plebeians to them, or so it seems.

  • I only date girls I find attractive, they may or may not be hot to others. I could care less.
    I really only dislike hot/pretty girls who know they're hot/pretty cause most of those girls are stuck up.

  • If I like a girl I'd go for it wither she's super hot or not, and if she was super hot I don't hold back thinking that I'm not good enough for her, heck I have eyes ears nose mouth limbs like everyone else what else is she looking for, you know.:D

  • I prefer beautiful intelligent women.

  • Honestly, couldn't care less if someone is "hot". I pay more attention to personality, plus the girls I'm usually interested in are more of the social outcasts lol

  • because they're hot? :p

  • Because I use to date girls regardless of their looks.

  • I'm not trying to be mean here but it's just too much of a hassle dating a hot girl. You have to worry if she'll go running to some other guy at the sign of trouble in the relationship, you have to worry about her getting sexual attention from different guys especially if she has low self esteem. Just wouldn't be a worth it to me unless she is the one. And there is only one "the one". But I'm not good looking enough physically to even get a girl like that interested in me so I'll never have that problem.

  • Hmmm... well the hot girls I know generally get asked out left and right. They kinda exude a sort of attitude that I don't particularly like. You get cocky when you are hit on so often. Whereas someone who isn't wanted by every guy will appreciate each time some dude asks her out. kinda like a money concept. The more money you have, the more corrupt you become.

  • I don't really place women in groups, whether as regards attractiveness or anything else, I just enjoy women as they are...

    • ok then, why do girls who get more attetion get asked out for a real relationship less?

    • Maybe it's because the signals they send out are not conducive to "real relationships", because they know they will keep getting more attention, and the more attention they get, the more they want.

  • like most of the kerala guys, i'll stay as virgin till my marriage. yes it's true. i flirts and have fun with hot girls, but my best friends and my lover is average looking. hot girls are hard to manage. they have always their options open. so so girls always take effort to keep the relationship going and they compliments us ☺ not only girls love compliments. we love that too. but we never openly show that. we just make a meh face. but our hearts must be jumping in joy

  • >Implying all men do this
    Women who make these generalisations about the opposite sex are so fucking irritating.

    • it wasn't implied all men do.

      go whine somewhere else.

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    • Fantastic rebuttal for a woman of your age. Honestly, I didn't even cringe once!

    • Hard to understand why she's single...

  • Usually girls with personality and that I can trust are what I go for... a girl can be hot but not is good for me or for a relationship

  • I don't date or fuck girls because no one will fuck me or date me




    • also, there's a certain type of personality and even looks that gets the hot girls... not all men who talk like they choose not to date them can date them.

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    • Just like how you're generalizing men right @asker

    • sorry i just felt like trying this cap thing out =) anyways, i think my thoughts are what everyone is thinking. cmon, pp are condtioned and behaviour is learnt. hot people are treated differently. so it makes sense theyre spoiled and even bad lovers. i have resources to back everything up lol. profession research and all

  • Sweet or bitchy does all the difference to me, presuming I am still attracted to the girl.

    Bitchy is our regardless of looks, sweet is in if she looks ok.

  • C. It seems like hotter girls, while more outgoing and friendly all around end up cheating. Even the ones I never saw coming.

  • My experience the hoy, hot girls can't fuck for shit

  • More from Guys

What Girls Said 8

  • From personal experience...

    Most men like the IDEA of "the hot grrrl" but are
    rarely equipped to handle the reality, finding
    themselves locked in a daily battle with other
    men for supremacy and ownership, which are
    not only signs of blatant insecurity but also
    disgusting messages to HER that she is just a
    possession NOT a person.

    Most men then find themselves in a heaven/hell
    paradox between smiling pride and seething jealousy
    knowing that they are powerless to control her as
    well as other peoples reactions towards her.

    This then creates MUCH misdirected anger,
    accusations and blame at ":the hot girl" when
    she did nothing whatsoever to provoke ANY of it!!!

    Ditto with the women who lack personal confidence
    so consider "hot girl" an instant threat and
    competition that they feel compelled to rip to
    shreds, behind her back. She has no real
    female friends apart from "other hot girls" who
    understand this, so unite.

    Funnier still is that MEN actually create "the hot girl"
    by THEIR seemingly uncontrollable sycophantic
    behaviour and reactions whenever she enters a room
    or is present ANYWHERE.

    They then TEAR HER DOWN for building her ego
    and self esteem on this very platform that THEY
    created, when in reality she was already stereotyped
    and given no other choice.

    THEE END!!!

  • That's so true
    I think it's because a lot of men want her and guys can't deal with that
    The so so girl is willing to do more to please a man

    • it's funny not a single guy so far is willing to admit this.

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    • I will admit that a lot of dudes, have the insecurity of the girl "trading up" for another guy, and proverbially throwing him off to the side.

      I find it pathetic that so many guys are afraid of having a "top tier" attractive girlfriend, just because he has to be on his toes and be the best boyfriend he can be, to keep her

    • I don't think this is much of an issue at all for well-adjusted guys. For jealous types, yes, they will lose their proverbial shit if there is even a wink from another guy.

      The issue is that really hot girls grow addicted to the dopamine high of the attention they get beginning when they're teenagers. That's why Instagram is littered with pictures of hot women's asses with 10,000+ likes. It's all about the attention, and women never seem to tire of receiving affirmations of their own superior beauty. Hot girls encourage the very type of attention that naturally destabilizes relationships. Why have one guy when you can have 25 chasing after you all the time.

  • Don't forget that hot girls also have an abundance of hot guys they can date and the nice guys who chase after these hot girls often don't have the confidence to be able to even ask these girls out. The hotter guys who are both confident and know what they want WILL seek relationships with the hotter girls because they are not afraid of them.

    Basically average guys date average girls, and hot guys date hot girls. With the rare exception which in all reality you don't see that often.

  • You know, I think the simplest answer: Is that if he gets with a hot chick, he assumes that she knows she's hotter than he is, so there wouldn't be any reason for her to stay faithful to him since she could get someone else really easily.

    But, the so-so chick isn't as hot as he is, so he assumes that if he can make her want him emotionally, it's a lot safer for him to get serious, because then she'll stay faithful since she can't get other men easier.

    It's not my idea though; I asked a Q on this awhile ago, look at the MHO if you want:

  • Decent guys date girls with actual morals and dignity.

    Assholes fuck the hot girls.

    • hot = immoral?

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    • there's a difference between settling and being with someone you're actually in love with.

      you implied it.

    • When did I ever imply I wasn't in love and just settling?
      You just unreasonably insulted my desirability towards men because you misread/misunderstood and when your insult backfired you instantly insult my the status of my relationship?

      I think anyone in the right mind such as @CreativeUsername_no and @angelwithin can see you are just using any excuse to win this argument when it's only making you look more foolish.

  • So so sad, I know, tell me about it.

  • Hot girls are often very full of themselves, acting like superior bitches :)

  • thats the purpose of the "hot" girls
    most of them are an easy lay, insecure deep down, and dont really have a character or any depth to them

    all they are good for is sex really
    they are not confident OR strong.. they are girls who like to sexualize themselves and guys help them to do it lol

    so so girls have more personality and they are more "wife" material

    • "That's the purpose of the "hot" girls... This comment makes me laugh. I am considered hot/beautiful and whatever else you want to call me but I am certainly not any of those things you listed.
      1. I've never been an easy lay - in fact I've never had a one night stand despite having many opportunities to do so. Anyone can be an easy lay - so so or hot.
      2. My personality is LARGER than life. Prime example is being out with my man, his friends and their girlfriends. While the other girls sit there, look miserable, don't socialize or have fun I have a blast with all the guys, when we leave they generally tell Matt how jealous they are that he gets me - I swear it's just because I am fun.

      Maybe stop generalizing "hot girls" into a group. I'm hot and generally get the guy I want, it might just take a little more work but I can guarantee you we are always on the same level looks wise.

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    • @HikerDude And I keep saying it's not ALL of the guys I know. Wtf. I repeat the same shit over and over. But I'm saying, if even the lowest of the low succeed with them, it says something.

      I got my chones in a twist haha

    • lmao calm down xD