Do you let a guy pursue you?

I joined Match. com to start dating again. I messaged this guy on there that lived about a couple of hours away from where I am. We messaged each other for about a week and I decided to give him my number. We have texted each other back and forth for about a week. I was near his location last week so we made a date. He took me to an upscale restaurant and bought me a flower after dinner. He texted me 30 minutes that night after the date that he hoped I had a good time and to let him know whenever I'm back in town. I thought we hit things off great but I haven't heard from him much since the date. To his credit, he is in a radiologist residency and about five years older than I am. I'm guessing he doesn't want to get to know much about me since we have not spoken since the date. Should I wait for him to pursue me and just forget about him in the meantime?


Most Helpful Guy

  • He is doing a great job of not crowding you by being a stage 5 clinger. Obviously he is interested in you, he brought you a flower, too you to an upscale restaurant, and did this even on the first date. I can bet you he is thinking, (Great gal, gorgeous smile, nice body, okay, I gotta slow down and approach this right before I blow it) my suggestion is call him and make the date, he is waiting in you, because he doesn't know your schedule, and you his. If he crowds you calling you desperately then you may loose interest. Finally, cause I'm long winded here.. lol... I may suggest, really reconsidering this long distance relationship, statistically they fell, but this is another subject, I may cover elsewhere. So beautiful, call him, set up a date, and enjoy the ride!

    • So I should call him instead of texting for our next date? I'll try that, sometimes I feel that text is not as personable. Thanks for the advice!

    • Yes calling is preferable, because at least you get to hear the tone of voice.

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What Guys Said 4

  • "I met this guy with a good job and a lot of class - he took me out for a nice dinner and got me flowers. He was polite afterwards and asked me to contact him again. It all went really well! So I'm just going to do nothing and let it fizzle out."

    *scratches head*

    • You do make a valid point. In my defense, I thought he would want to communicate more if he was interested.

    • It'll take two to tango during any relationship, don't be afraid to do a little legwork yourself.

    • True thanks for the advice!

  • I have to agree with the other guys. Why would a guy pursue you if you show no signs in being interested in him? I am really trying to understand your behavior here. Text him back and say you had a good time or did not have a good time.

  • He could just be busy o_O
    Maybe message him?

  • He may be taking your lack of action as a sign you are not interested. I think women who sit back and let the guy take all the action often end up missing out on relationships they would otherwise have had a shot at. Men are human too and appreciate a sign from a woman that she is interested, just like women do.

    Sounds like he did everything right. Your turn...


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